LaraP....

[bcody]

Lara, just wondering how things were going and hope you are doing well.

 

[loveminis]

I hope your situation is better

 

[LaraP]

Well things are about the same. Just went thru another Birthday without Joshua. I can't believe he would be 24 yrs old.. that is just wild to think about. It seems like we lost him yesterday. Geez.

As far as my Mom.. I just know by next yr this time she isn't even going to know who I am let alone the brother and sisters. She is really slipping mentallly and it seems she is gone longer each time.

I will tell you all this much, I have really taken to heart all that was said when I posted about my feelings etc the first time. I look at her in at totally new light. She can't help what she says or thinks. I still get annoyed at times, but I just keep my mouth shut and keep on trucking. I feel better after I torn my siblings apart, and told them do what you think you can all live with. I will have no guilt if I out live her. But it didn't change alot.

I sit and listen to my Mom talk most of the day about her Mom and Dad, it use to be all my Dad. seems she has kinda forgotten him. Her mind has taken her further back. My Grand mother must have been quite the lady. I know she had 13 kids but she even made their shoes?? I think whatever Mom, how in the world could she have made their shoes? She told me that they took a bath once a week, started with the little ones first and the older ones went last in the same bath water. She has so so many stories that she tells everyday, most of the time there are the same but its fun to listen to the stuff they did when they were little. I bet those kids drove my Grandma nuts.

I think the hardest thing to listen to her when she cusses and talks dirty. SO BIZARRE for me to hear. Not that I a don't cuss etc, but to have your 86 yr old mother talk about sex is like sick. I do hope she is talking about my Dad. LOL.

But I am enjoying her much more than before, because of you guys. I feel stronger, but I have put my foot down with her alittle more, I make her help take care of herself. I have her do little chores during the day, folding washrags, she rolls them and puts them in a basket. Not one is rolled the same. She dusts little nicknacks I make her dry her arms and upper part of her body now when she gets out of the bathtub. So we are doing much better

Thank You all once again

Lara

 

[backwoodsnanny]

Lara

IT is not unusual at all that she is going further back often the oldest memories are the last to go while what she had for breakfast may escape her by tonight. Were you able to connect with an agency so that you are getting respite? I hope so. The burn out rate of the caregiver becoming sick is high so you have to be sure you have a few hours a week that are yours. Even with your improved understanding it still will wear on you so you need to get the help even if you dont think so. Most agencies that provide this service are compassionate and hire very reliable people. Continued prayers for you and your mom.

 

[bcody]

Lara, it is good to hear from you. Do you write down or record her (good) stories? I hope you are taking time to take care of yourself, and getting help with her care. It is good to keep her busy with little things, for both of you. Hang in there, and remember we are here for you. AND, if you need to vent please do, it is good for us and you have good friends here who understand.

 

[loveminis]

Lara,

You sound so strong there girl

and in this situation it's hard to be strong with all the emotions flowing. Keep up the good work and thank God she has you. The worst thing is when you see your parents going downhill and you know that it will never get better.

Thank you for checking in, I understand what you are going through.