Arghhhhhh, Cant stand my Mum sometimes

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Secret22

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I have Secret in a small paddock becasue he has blownen up as a balloon lately and Mum keeps telling me to let him out for a munch but he seriously has enough in the smallish paddock and deffinately doesnt need the extra munch's on the rich grass. Oh and Mum is into horse and all like she rides and stuff but I dont know why she i like this about Secret. She doesnt understand Secret could founder and die. Any Advice??
 
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Wow, Franklin, that was a bit harsh. I don't think she's being disrespectful here, I think she's worried about her horse. My advice would be to sit down with your mom and have a talk with her about your concerns. Be prepared, and have tons of info right there about founder, obesity, and anything else you think could be a result of his being so fat. I had to do this recently too, with the owner of the boarding facility where I keep my boys. She got "lazy" (her word!) and was feeding my 2 under 30" young colts a full flake of alfalfa a day (in addition to the grain they get). They were getting to be obese. They have not foundered, and are losing weight slowly. Just sit down with your mom and discuss the situation. Don't lose your temper, and don't be disrespectful. Your mom probably knows a lot about big horses, but minis aren't like big horses in some ways (such as how fat they can get so quickly).
 
First off, why do you suddenly think your horse is too fat?? How big is he, what does he weigh?? When was he last wormed?? What sort of work does he do??

Your Mother may well be right, you may well be wrong.

Also, you live in your Mothers house!!

She gets to make the rules.

There is NO way she is trying to sabotage your looking after your horse- for the record I have had Minis out on lush grass 24/7 for over twenty five years and not one has foundered and died, so your Mother might just know more than you do.

If your horse is grossly overweight and does need to diet then you need to talk to her about it.

If he is happily overweight, I cannot see the problem.

What is wrong with a fat horse, if you are not trying to show it, and it is not being ridden/driven every day??
 
Well as for how to address the problem with communicating with your mom, you will probably get much better advice from those in your peer group. There are few women on this board who can talk with younger people and not mash them into the ground. Hopefully, some of them may reply.

I think you need to be able to present valid reasons for your concern in a logical grown up manner to illustrate your concern. NO ONE should be purposely making their minis obsese and just because one has not killed one with founder doesn't mean they weren't made to suffer founder because of such ignorance.

It's a serious problem and it's extremely easy to let it slide until it's too late. Most minis can live on a breath of air it seems and get extremely obese in a short period of time. I do think you have a valid concern and it just may mean finding the right way to help your mom understand the potential problems and avoid them, rather than try to repair the damage later.

Edited to add: I must reiterate what Bluerogue said, minis aren't like big horses in some ways. Just because someone has "experience" with horses doesn't mean there isn't always more to learn.
 
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Mine run on grass 24/7, but we don't feed them as much grain because they eat all the time. I know my minis are not show shape, but they are not obese. We have cold winters here so mine lose a lot of their weight through the winter, but they put it back on before winter.

I have two that are too skinny from having babies late this summer so we are trying to get more weight on them.

Just talk to your mom about your concerns without getting upset and maybe ask for her input so she feels she might be helpful instead of in your opinion wrong.

Working together will achieve more than working against each other.
 
Well as a mom and as a daughter I know that feeling of being so frustrated with your mom and not liking them much always is totally normal.. I can love my mom and not like her at the moment and same thing with my daughter it is part of a mom and daughter relationship...

Now that aside while some keep there horses on grass 24/7 and have no problems others have foundered and do have issues and for some reason minis and ponies tend to be more prone.

I would do a couple of things first really feel your mini to make sure he is fat and not just way hairy. Next instead of saying mom you are wrong.. bring some stuff on founder to show her and talk about with her about.

Some people beleive that all horses are not being horses if not turned out in a herd in a pasture and well frankly that is just not true in fact many horses many top show horses and the top horses in the world arent turned out in a herd 24/7 eating grass.

Just be patient and know that part of this is a mom daughter control thing and it is TOTALLY NORMAL
 
bluerogue said:
Wow, Franklin, that was a bit harsh. I don't think she's being disrespectful here, I think she's worried about her horse. My advice would be to sit down with your mom and have a talk with her about your concerns. Be prepared, and have tons of info right there about founder, obesity, and anything else you think could be a result of his being so fat. I had to do this recently too, with the owner of the boarding facility where I keep my boys. She got "lazy" (her word!) and was feeding my 2 under 30" young colts a full flake of alfalfa a day (in addition to the grain they get). They were getting to be obese. They have not foundered, and are losing weight slowly. Just sit down with your mom and discuss the situation. Don't lose your temper, and don't be disrespectful. Your mom probably knows a lot about big horses, but minis aren't like big horses in some ways (such as how fat they can get so quickly).
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I agree, ever time Franklin has posted not very nice, I can tell you that wont last long and people will start getting mad, honestly, Franklin has what 22 posts(??) and the ones that I have seen (probably 15) have been harsh!

Hi Charlie:) Do you remember me? I am the one that told you about this site?? Maybe you could comprimise and maybe let him out for 2-3 hours and then bring him back.... Hey, we would love to see some more pics of your pony! How big is he?

Gage
 
Hi

Its kind of hard to know if your horse is to fat without a picture therefore I would not give you any advice on that topic BUT you really should not start of your thread with “I cant stand my Mum sometimes†That can get some of us Moms a bit worked up real fast--- even if you were to be right this time, and I’m not saying you are or are not. My daughter is 13 and if she said she cant stand me on a public forum I would be a bit pi**ed at her.

How about if you post a picture of your horse and then if the majority of the forum members agree with you then you could print it out and show you’re Mom --- Leave out the part about you cant standing her sometimes.
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I think if you could get a recent picture of the littlun that would help lots...Then we can tell you if you're right or your mum is right.
 
while I agree a picture will help not sure why it has to be a one side or the other (as put by others not you) it is very possible to both be right.. what works for one horse may not work at all for another!
 
Hey Guys, Its either stand up for for what I believe in and my horse or let him founder and die. Oh and he is obesely overweight but I have no recent photos to show. And Franklin that was very harsh!! I posted this topic to get some support not hear words like the ones you said! Secert gets let out for a couple of hours a day now and then put back in. Thanx to all those who supported me :)
 
When you post like this we can, in all fairness, only give advice on the information given. It's not that we do not wish to support you, were I to believe you were in the right and your Mother in the wrong, I would support you as would many others. We still do not know how tall your horse is, or what his weight is, or even how old he is and what sort of work regime he is on. A couple of hours a day is not much- what other feed is he getting??

You see, if you give us the WHOLE picture, we can help- even if it is not necessarily what you wish to hear.

I would still like to know why you think he is obese, and your Mother does not??

As I said, we cannot give "blind" support, that would not be helping you.

You stating he is "obese" does not help either as we have heard that many times before.

A height and weight, or a picture would be the only way we could begin to give you the support you obviously believe you should get.
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Okay - Secret is about 9-10hh altho Im not sure how much he weighs. I am sure he is obese because he has fat rolls on his neck and his belly has a jelly look and is huge! He is only 3 and he is not in any serious work altho shows are coming up ova here and he needs to tone down. I dont think Mum thinks he is not obese I think she ignores the fact that hes huge altho if her mare is a lil over weight she put in a paddock with less grass to tone down and she aint in any work either at the moment. Does that give you more of a picture??
 
OK so he's a bit fat. Can you get/borrow a weight tape and give us an idea of how much he weighs?? If we are going to help- and if he is seriously over weight we can at least give you written support and advice here that you could then print off and show to your Mother as a starting point- we do have to be very sure of out facts. Apart from the grass he gets during turnout, what else does he get to eat??

What sort of showing are you going to be doing as he obviously is out of Mini classes- if you are getting or thinking of getting him in training to jump or do obstacle, or even start harness or ridden classes, obviously he does need t be quite trim, as a start to being brought fit.
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We live in a country and dont have a weight tape sorry. I will probably do Inhand, Obstacle and Jumping with him as he cant be ridden yet especialy by me lol that'd be a sight.
 
We live in a country and dont have a weight tape sorry. I will probably do Inhand, Obstacle and Jumping with him as he cant be ridden yet especialy by me lol that'd be a sight. Oh and he gets nothing else to eat execpt a handfull of grain of a lice of carrot 'sometimes'.
 
Correct me if I'm wrong but you're only feeding him the occasional carrot, a handful of grain(how many times per day?) and two or so hours of grass? To me that doesn't sound like enough to eat.
 
Actually, there is a little bit of grass in the smallish paddock he is in. he just gets let out into the open for a hour of so a day to mix around with the other horses. Its just the isnt HEAPS of grass in the smallish paddock so he cant overeat.

Oh and he gets a little bit of carrot when i visit him some times just as a treat.
 
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Just let him be fat and happy ...it would be much more then the horse i just saw on tv
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. Unless your doing any showing anytime soon (which im sure you wont being its mid winter) ..just let it go.

Leeana
 
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