a quandary

[2minis4us]

It would definitely depend on why.

 

[jegray21]

Ok I guess I would have to know why too...but it would have to be a really really good reason..

 

[Riverdance]

My husband did object to me having horses.........I left him.

 

[chandab]

I voted no, no way, but have to add that would depend too...

If it were a financial crisis or serious illness then obviously cutting back would have to be looked at. Serious enough illness then I guess I would have to look at having the horses all gone.

But--if this were just his wishes--he wants to do something different or feels too much time is spent on the horses, or figures the horses are to blame for whatever problem exists in the relationship--then no.

I've seen it happen too many times that one partner insists that the other must give up her interest, be it horses or something else--she goes along with it & gives up the horses. Then not so far down the road /she comes to regret the fact that she gave up her horses. Generally it turns out that the real problem wasn't the horses--that was just the excuse given by the partner. Maybe he was already fooling around with someone else & chose to blame the horses to cover up his own fault/guilt, or perhaps he was just resentful of the time/money spent on the horses and figured if the horses were gone he'd get more attention--those are two scenarios. Usually it doesn't work--the horses are gone and the real underlying problem still exists.

Lazy person's answer... Me, too. You said it better than I could.

My husband knew when he married me, that I came with horses. Granted since we got married, I've increased my numbers, but still down-sized... I had 3 saddle horses when we got married, and two of those were pregnant mares. In the meantime, I bought a couple more saddle horses, then eventually sold the purchased horses, one of the original mares and one of the foals, lost my aged gelding; so that leaves me with 2 saddle horses. However... I now have 12 minis; bought 10, raised one and was given one.

We raise cattle, so are pretty much committed to staying home and caring for livestock.

 

[Molly's Run Minis]

if someone told me to get rid of my minis it would go somethin like this:

:GoGetUm

:GoGetUm

:GoGetUm

put simply, it would turn into WW3. and i would not lose

 

[susanne]

This reminds me of a t-shirt...Liichtenstein-style cartoon of woman with tear running down her cheek: "He said it was him or my animals, and -- [sob] -- we miss him!"

Keith would never ask. If it were that bad off financially, I'd already know and we would have come up with a solution together. He would NEVER ask, and actually, he'd never let me get rid of them. We'd find a way to work it out.

If a man asked me such a question, I'd have to severely question my judgment, because I'd never get involved with someone who would think he'd have the right to ask such a thing OR think that HE was in charge of our finances.

 

[wingnut]

I answered "No". When we started down this path to owning 6 miniatures, I had a very long, very serious talk with my husband. He was the one who initially brought the whole idea to light, much to my shock and amazement. I told him that before I purchased so much as a single grain, a single post, a single roll of fence, a single nail...you name it, he had to know that this was something that was going to be for the long haul. He COULD NOT come to me 10 months, 24 months, 4 years, 8 years, etc. and say "Uh, I changed my mind." He HAD to know that this was something I would absolutely get head over heels into and I needed to know NOW if this was going to become a problem.

We agreed that any additions or subtractions or changes would be MUTUALLY agreed upon. I haven't brought home ANY horse that I didn't have his buy in. I am always amazed when I hear the opposite. Nearly every decision on every level is discussed between us. It has in fact, been a very strengthening process for our marriage.

To ask me to just be done with them would CRUSH me and he knows it. Even though it's 100x more work than I ever needed and certainly did NOT needed to an already heavy load. But it is the most satisfying work I have ever done. Even on bitter cold days, downpours of rain with mud a mile deep, blizzards and summer heat/humidty, I love every single minute of it.

Seriously, just thinking about it has me in tears.

 

[sfmini]

I voted no way, but it really depends on the situation. If it is financial, then yes, I would have to, but personal? Nope, the horses and my dogs are part of the package and are non negotiable.

 

[shadelady]

I don't think any of us are in a position to really comment on this situation. You would have to know the whole story, and all the reasoning behind it. Like others on here my partner and I have made all descisions together regarding the horses ( granted we share the interest).If you are truly 'partners' then this whole situation can be talked out.

 

[Katiean]

If it were for financial reasons, I do not think they would have to ask.

However, my ex told me to get rid of my tiny yorkie female (my first yorkie)that was already 2 years old when I met him. He did not like the dog and she did not like him. So, to try stay togeather I sold my dog. She was already bred and I was to get the litter back. When she had her puppies there was one puppy that was taking it's time. So instead of calling me the woman took her to the vet and had a c-section to remove the last puppy. The next day she called me and my Brandy (she was my first Brandy) would not allow the puppies to feed. I went over there and sat on the floo in front of her (Brandy's) bed. I calmed her and she let her puppies to feed. She fell asleep with her head in my hand. After about a half an hour I slipped my hand out from under Brandy's head and slipped out. I told the woman to call me if she had any more problems. About 2 hours latter the woman called me. She said Brandy had just woke up. She looked around and didn't see me and she died. I had to go pick up the puppies to hand feed them. The problem was I really loved that dog and because of Steve's selfishness she died. Notice he is my ex. I will NEVER give up anything for anyone ever again.