would like your input

[stormo41]

Hey everyone. I would like your input on this topic.

my friend told me last night that her and her b/f are going to adopt a cat together. My friend and her b/f do not live together so this struck me a little odd, and not to mention the fact that their relationship is really rocky alot of the time (but hey thats none of my bee's wax) anyway, the cat would live at his place (apartment) where another cat (roomates) already lives, and the cat will go with him up north when school is over. I reminded her about what happened when i lived with my ex and we got pets, when we broke up he took them and a month later they showed up on my door and i was not able to take care of them and it was a big mess. Now she is telling me it will be his cat and the next e-mail says it will be their cat...confusing already.

Anyway I told them that i think it would be a bad idea for them to adopt a cat together. and that since he is 5 digits in debt that maybe a cat should not be the first thing on his list of things to pay for. I also refered them to local rescues and petfinder.com because i know my friend and i know once she sets her mind to something she does it right or wrong lol.

so what do you think? is it a good idea or a bad idea? just thought it would be interesting to find out what other people besides myself think.

-Vanessa

 

[mininik]

It may work out, or it may be a distaster (mainly for the cat). I groom a dog who is owned by a couple who does not live together and they all do fine, but it is a bit confusing for me with their different tastes in grooming. When my boyfriend and I met, we had one dog each. We adopted another dog shortly after we met who either one of us would take on if we split. The other two dogs and pony who have joined our family since then are "ours," but really mine. Obviously if something ever happened to make it so we couldn't properly care for these pets we would rehome them for the sake of their well being. Hopefully your friends will do the same for this cat.

 

[runamuk]

Well lets see...my sister and her one boyfriend took in a dumped pup which became very much his and then adopted another dog too keep the other company. When they split up the boyfriend took both and my sister had visitation :bgrin later my sister's next BF wanted a bulldog and I found them a rescue/rehome then her BF got her a border collie pup. When they split up my sister kept the boyz.......and they could not be more pampered.

: It helps to have either a plan or to have two people who both are willing to take on the pet if a breakup should happen. When hubby and I get new critters they are always mine even if they like him more :bgrin :bgrin ultimately I am the one who decides if critters stay or go and I rarely commit to a dog or cat with the idea it will be rehomed......foster animals are different they stay until they find a home. I have recently been offered an adult/older english setter, asked hubby and his normal response is always the same NO MORE PETS yeah that works real well for him....LOL. I now will try to help rehome the setter and if circumstances become desperate I may take it as a foster if that is needed. Every dog I have taken as a foster has found a home and the ones I committed to lived out their lives with us or are still with us.

It can be done if the people put the critter first.

 

[Minimor]

well, as long as they really, seriously want the cat, it can work out fine. If this is just a sudden whim then I sure hope that if/when they tire of the cat that they will do what is best for the cat, and not just get rid of it however they can.

Hopefully the boyfriend's debt load isn't going to affect his ability to feed & provide vet care for the cat.

I do hope it won't prove to be a disaster for the cat.

 

[HGFarm]

I would be really concerned how they are going to afford the cat- vet bills and even simple things such as food, litter, etc..... Seems these type of situations are one of the ones that cause the humane societies to fill up with unwanted pets after a while.

I would not adopt one 'together' - it should belong to one or the other, who can AFFORD to take care of them.

 

[Miniv]

Why are they adopting this cat as a couple if their relationship isn't secure? Is this like having a child to keep a marriage together???

:

MANY MANY years ago I was engaged to someone and living with him. It was HIS apartment. And we adopted a kitten. Obviously we broke up after a couple of years and the cat stayed with him because it was HIS apartment and I was going into a place that didn't allow pets. It was an agreement between us, but we both were animal lovers.

Interestingly, I heard from him several years later after we had married other people.........just to let me know that Nea had passed away. This resulted in us exchanging Christmas cards ever since! :bgrin

My personal opinion about the situation would depend on the couple and one of them should be willing to take responsibility over the other, should their relationship not last. So, it's a tough call, since every unmarried couple I've known never wants to look ahead that far.

MA