Turning over yet another new leaf...

[LindaL]

My partner has decided that life as a couple is "too much for her to handle" right now (she lost her mom almost 3 months ago and has new *scary* health issues on top of that), so we have decided to part ways as friends. It saddens me...yes, I can't deny it...but I have survived this before and I will again. While I don't understand fully her pain and depression (my parents are still living and I am still "mostly" healthy), I do accept her desire to be alone at this time and I have and will continue to support her! I don't really want to go into too much detail about HER life and situation, so let's just say it's BETTER for us this way. Yes, I love her and I will miss her desparately, but...this is something I can not control. I want her to be "OK" and I am willing to end our relationship in order for that to happen.

Where does that leave me? Well, I have a good job that I am not willing to give up, so I will be looking for a new place closer to my job. I have a new horse (and my MinPin) that I am NOT willing to give up, so hopefully either I can find a place that will accommodate ALL of us, but if not the horse can stay boarded where he is. Showing may not be in our near future since my "ride" (Tracy's Element) will no longer be accessable and I don't own a truck/trailer.

So, I am moving yet again (this will make 6 moves since 2003!)...and this will be the 1st time since I was 21 yrs old that I will be living ALONE (no kids, husband/partners)!!!

(hmm...guess I need to change my avatar and signature, huh? *sigh*)

:

Edited for spelling errors and I also wanted to mention that we are still going to Disneyland together in another week, so yes, we ARE still friends!

 

[minisaremighty]

I'm sorry Linda. I do have to say, you truly do love her to part this way with her and still be friends. THAT is wonderful. I wish the best for both of you and that she gets through this rough spot in her life and moves on to be happy once again. Hoping you find just the right new "home"

:

 

[Casnos Minis]

[SIZE=18pt]I'm sorry to hear the you are parting ways, but glad to hear that you are staying friends. Good luck with your move and I'm glad to see you got a horse. Have fun at Disneyland. My sone keeps asking when are we going to Disney World and I just keep telling him in a few years when you are old enough to enjoy it![/SIZE]

Christy

 

[Mona]

So sorry Linda. Maybe after things calm down a little later on, you two will get back together. If it's meant to be, it will happen. Take care, and good luck with your future.

 

[alongman]

I admire you! You are a very strong woman to let her find herself - so very unselfish of you.

 

[Lisa-Ruff N Tuff Minis]

I am very sorry. However you know how I feel about this part.. I think your being alone and living alone while scary will be so empowering for you and will be a real turning point in your life.

Stay strong you are totally on the right path even if it doesnt seem like it all the time.

 

[CyndiM]

[SIZE=36pt]((((HUGS))))[/SIZE]

 

[Marty]

When you have been hurt so badly, it changes all of you. Sometimes, when people loose someone they love, it sends them into a place of retreat.

This is a private place where they hide themselves and try to protect themselves from more hurt.

In that place, they need time to sorts things out, and try to make sense of it all. Sometimes they loose their way, and who they are, and they only know dispair. Nobody can help no matter how hard they try. Only the one that is in the retreat can come out only when they are ready, and not before.

There comes a time in everyone's lives that they have to accept things that they don't want to. And then try to find a way to go on. Sometimes they make it. And sometimes they don't.

It's so hard. It hurts so bad.

HUGS

 

[rabbitsfizz]

Life goes on. Linda, it will be OK.

Whatever is in your future, I wish you the very best.

 

[Jill]

I will be thinking of you, Linda! You are a strong woman. {{{hugs}}}

 

[shane]

wishing you all the very best....and admire the two of you remaining friends........good luck!

 

[Pandora]

I also just ended a relationship and I know how hard it can be. I'm glad you 2 can be friends. Know that you're not alone.

 

[LindaL]

Thanks for all your kind words and support. When I wrote that 1st post, I was being brave and confident, but last night Tracy and I spent a lot of time "hanging out" (went to see the Akiane art exhibit...AMAZING!!!...and to a few stores), but then we came home and started talking seriously about some financial obligations we have together and I just LOST it!! :no: How did this HAPPEN?!? OK, I'm crying again, so I need to quit typing....

Edited:

OK, I am OK again...It's just very hard, because it isn't like I've been living in some sort of denial bubble (like I was the only one who didn't know this was about to happen)...It just HAPPENED in a split second (seriously)...so I am still in shock here. Until a few days ago, we were shopping for "stuff" together...like a couple. *sigh*

I don't want to start living in a "what if" mentality...I need to think ahead for myself, but...in the meantime, we both can't afford to move, so it may take a month or 2, so who knows what may happen or not in that time...

:

 

[Connie P]

When you have been hurt so badly, it changes all of you. Sometimes, when people loose someone they love, it sends them into a place of retreat.

This is a private place where they hide themselves and try to protect themselves from more hurt.

In that place, they need time to sorts things out, and try to make sense of it all. Sometimes they loose their way, and who they are, and they only know dispair. Nobody can help no matter how hard they try. Only the one that is in the retreat can come out only when they are ready, and not before.

There comes a time in everyone's lives that they have to accept things that they don't want to. And then try to find a way to go on. Sometimes they make it. And sometimes they don't.

It's so hard. It hurts so bad.

HUGS

VERY VERY well said Marty!!!

:

:

 

[nootka]

I'm so sorry, Linda, for all the sadness this brings, and for all Tracy is going through.

I do hope for happiness, for hope and comfort for both of you.

You will prevail, you are amazing and well-loved even so.

Feel free to come visit if you would like a break or something.

Good luck!!!

Liz M.

 

[Shortpig]

For Tracy and her pain Marty said it best. I lost a dearly loved brother on Thanksgiving Night. Still hurts

and I expect it will for some time yet. For you yes living alone can be scary. It has been suggested

that I share my home with someone, I have an apartment in my basement. That also is scary for me as

I might know and trust the person I share my home with, but then I have to try to trust their friends and the people who stop by to see them. How does it go, once burned twice shy. Plus it's hard to find someone

who will be gentle and kind to my critters. Someone who can put up with their idiotism, trust me they

can be idiots at times. Not to mention the laundry facilities are also downstairs which I share with my

daughter and her husband. Some nights I'm just not able to sleep because of fear. My big dogs help

alot. The older I get the more fearful I get. But, the times I love are when I get up in the morning and

don't have someone asking me to jump up and care for them when I really don't feel like it. Honestly I

have been alone since my significant other person walked out the door in July of 1997. And he told me

as he was packing his stuff that he was leaving. OUCH! My horses have been life savers for me. I had

to get up every morning to feed and care for them and they kept me focused on what is truly important.

They love without expectation. They accept us for who we are. They enjoy spending time with us

even if we are crying and they don't understand. Or do they? My dogs love and protect me and the

horses. So life goes on and we strong women will survive. So you go girl.

 

[Matt73]

Awww Linda, I'm so sorry to hear that. It's always sad when anything good comes to an end. You sound like a strong woman, though, and will get through this. It's always nice when you can remain friends and ease the separation. And, I know all about that moving business; I probably moved 6 or 7 times from 2000 to 2003. You kind of get used to it in a way. That said, it's always nice to have somewhere stable. Thinking good thoughts for you and Tracy.

Take Care

 

[Matt73]

Awww Linda, I'm so sorry to hear that. It's always sad when anything good comes to an end. You sound like a strong woman, though, and will get through this. It's always nice when you can remain friends and ease the separation. And, I know all about that moving business; I probably moved 6 or 7 times from 2000 to 2003. You kind of get used to it in a way. That said, it's always nice to have somewhere stable. Thinking good thoughts for you and Tracy.

Take Care

 

[LindaL]

For Tracy and her pain Marty said it best. I lost a dearly loved brother on Thanksgiving Night. Still hurts

and I expect it will for some time yet. For you yes living alone can be scary. It has been suggested

that I share my home with someone, I have an apartment in my basement. That also is scary for me as

I might know and trust the person I share my home with, but then I have to try to trust their friends and the people who stop by to see them. How does it go, once burned twice shy. Plus it's hard to find someone

who will be gentle and kind to my critters. Someone who can put up with their idiotism, trust me they

can be idiots at times. Not to mention the laundry facilities are also downstairs which I share with my

daughter and her husband. Some nights I'm just not able to sleep because of fear. My big dogs help

alot. The older I get the more fearful I get. But, the times I love are when I get up in the morning and

don't have someone asking me to jump up and care for them when I really don't feel like it. Honestly I

have been alone since my significant other person walked out the door in July of 1997. And he told me

as he was packing his stuff that he was leaving. OUCH! My horses have been life savers for me. I had

to get up every morning to feed and care for them and they kept me focused on what is truly important.

They love without expectation. They accept us for who we are. They enjoy spending time with us

even if we are crying and they don't understand. Or do they? My dogs love and protect me and the

horses. So life goes on and we strong women will survive. So you go girl.

Thanks Marie!! (Sorry to hear about your brother!!

) I am not afraid of living alone...in a way, I am actually looking forward to it!! I can watch what I want on TV, leave a few dishes in the sink IF I feel like it (I usually dont...lol), leave my bed un-made, TAKE a bath (I am a bit of a germaphobe and won't take a bath if I share a bathtub with anyone else..even if the tub is clean...LOL!

: )..but I all these things don't really matter, since Tracy won't be there...*sigh*

It IS true about the animals, tho...Tracy's dog Blitz has been hanging around me alot more..and "comforting" me when I cry...gonna miss him!! I will have my dog, tho, so that will be good!