I have decided I no longer

[_minihorses4ever_]

Oh Jamie.. Please don't do this. I love having you to come to when I need help, and I don't think you deserve this. Jamie, your horses WOULD JUMP THE MOON for you. How do you think they would feel if you just gave up? They need you. I know I can't relate to you and your mom's issue, but is it that bad to back out of what you love?

 

[becks_cupid]

Could be way off track here but maybe your mum feels a little left out.She could be seeing you get your independence and showing your horses a heap of affection she may not be getting. Just a tad of jealousy could be involved here. Could you maybe have someone take care of the horses while you and your mum spend a little time together so you can see clearly where you are both coming from.TALk together not at one another.Just a day or two out together or if you have to ask her to help like you would love to have her involved WITH you not just a parent where she is feeling like she is handing out. Just let her know you are showing the horses the love she has learnt from you.I know they probably feel like your outlet and your mum is sensing that so just needs a reminder that you love her the same. Us mothers can become childish at times also but don't say you are giving into her I really don't think underneath she wants that, just maybe spend some extra time with her to let her know she means as much to you as the horses and your not just using her.

Anyways chin up its all a lesson in giving and taking.Hard as it is.I'll pray you compromise and things work out

Kel

 

[Leeana]

I'm also sad to hear this.

You had a big future infront of you, you even had an internship with a big time trainer and shower didnt you? I just dont understand how you wake up one morning and decide that you are just going to throw all your dreams and plans away. I think you have the right to do what you want, and i know for you to do something like this or even think about it ....it has to be something big that happened.

I have to admit, sometime my parents push my limits far over the edge but the horses really keep me sain! Maybe you should make your horses 'your excape' in a way. Spend more time in the barn when times get touph with your mother.

I just hate to see you throw your dream down the drain, but i have no right to critizise you. Your an adult ...but i just had high hopes for you i think.

Leeana

 

[Happy Valley]

Can't say anything that someone else hasn't already. Back your own judgement, that is what my Dad says to me and I am 38 years old. I do hope that this has a happy ending for you, Jamie. You have been indispensible and you mean a lot to me.

Stacye

 

[IllusiveHussler]

You know how I feel about this hun...I wish you wouldn't give up.

Remember, I'm here for you whenever.

:

 

[Feather1414]

I hear each and everyone and trust me, I am listening.

For whoever siad that I should try and pay her for the shows : I have tried. I myself would drive there, but I don't have a liscense just yet and I wouldnt be allowed to take them with me in the first place.

To Marty: I do pay for everything concerning my horses. I pay feed, bedding, vets, farrier and most importantly, I pay for showing entirely by myself. Its not an issue with her paying for things since I do all that. My grades are fine. I help her around the house, I am pretty noncholant about most things.

I show my moms alpacas for her. I have offered to teach her how to show my horses. She refuses that one each and every time. I try and spend time with her.

barnbum : I do try and tell my mom about my day. I really do. I WANT to include her into my life. I know it sounds quite crazy, but its her who is pushing me away. Just today I told her about a fun prank I pulled on my friend ((I sprayed the front of his locker with really strong body spray)) and she told me I was a mean person and more that I will not get into.

I for the most part do what she tells me, when she tells me. There are SEVERAL instances where she tells me to do one thing, and then I am in the middle of doing it when she tells me to do something else right away. So I would finish the job I was doing and get in trouble for that, or I would leave it to come back to and do the other job and get in trouble for doing a "half assed job" on what I started. I just can't win with her.

 

[Reble]

I do know that there comes a time in a teenage girl's life, that Mom and Daughter, just don't see eye to eye.

I know my daughters at a certain age, wrapped their Dad around their fingers and I was the bad parent.

It will change give it some time and I will be thinking of you.

Raised 3 girls, they are 21, 29 and 31 now/ (oops telling my age again. )

:

and 1 son now 31.

:

:

:

Take care never make decisions when you are upset or angry. :nono:

 

[rabbitsfizz]

Jamie, get a counsellor involved in this- if you do not trust the school ones, do you have a Pastor??

You can also get independent help- over here we have a thing called "Child Line" where you can ring up and get some answers or just tell your side and get listened to- I will see if there is a version in the States.

I am sorry folks but, coming form a home where I suffered mental abuse most of my childhood, (NOT form my Mother but, much as I loved her she screwed me up , too) ...Parents are NOT always right, and parents do not always know best, and parents are often so wrong they are the WHOLE problem, in which case they do need help to prevent them messing the kids up.

What you appear to need here is an independent , experienced person who can tell yo which of the options is correct.

At your age, if your Mother is not willing to listen to the mediator(if they think she is at fault) the decision may be far harder than merely getting rid of the horses.

I think to do this is a putting a band aid over a gunshot wound, and I think, if things are exactly as you say, she will soon find some other thing that annoys her.

Been there, done all that!!

Get help.

:

 

[Mijke]

Quitting with miniatures will not solve the problem your mom and you are having. I think you know that yourself as well.

I think the advises given and especcially the advice from rabbit are things to look into and worth trying. Try to find an adult that you trust, and is capable of making your mother understand that help is needed for your both.

Jamie, get a counsellor involved in this- if you do not trust the school ones, do you have a Pastor??

You can also get independent help- over here we have a thing called "Child Line" where you can ring up and get some answers or just tell your side and get listened to- I will see if there is a version in the States.

I am sorry folks but, coming form a home where I suffered mental abuse most of my childhood, (NOT form my Mother but, much as I loved her she screwed me up , too) ...Parents are NOT always right, and parents do not always know best, and parents are often so wrong they are the WHOLE problem, in which case they do need help to prevent them messing the kids up.

What you appear to need here is an independent , experienced person who can tell yo which of the options is correct.

At your age, if your Mother is not willing to listen to the mediator(if they think she is at fault) the decision may be far harder than merely getting rid of the horses.

I think to do this is a putting a band aid over a gunshot wound, and I think, if things are exactly as you say, she will soon find some other thing that annoys her.

Been there, done all that!!

Get help.

:

 

[Feather1414]

Jamie, get a counsellor involved in this- if you do not trust the school ones, do you have a Pastor??

You can also get independent help- over here we have a thing called "Child Line" where you can ring up and get some answers or just tell your side and get listened to- I will see if there is a version in the States.

I am sorry folks but, coming form a home where I suffered mental abuse most of my childhood, (NOT form my Mother but, much as I loved her she screwed me up , too) ...Parents are NOT always right, and parents do not always know best, and parents are often so wrong they are the WHOLE problem, in which case they do need help to prevent them messing the kids up.

What you appear to need here is an independent , experienced person who can tell yo which of the options is correct.

At your age, if your Mother is not willing to listen to the mediator(if they think she is at fault) the decision may be far harder than merely getting rid of the horses.

I think to do this is a putting a band aid over a gunshot wound, and I think, if things are exactly as you say, she will soon find some other thing that annoys her.

Been there, done all that!!

Get help.

:

Thank you Jane, although sadly there is virtually no way I could get help. My mom first off refuses to think she is doing ANYTHING wrong whatsoever and she blames it all on I. I don't go to church - please don't flame me for that one.

We are going on a cruise for spring break, so I will be back after that. Feel free to PM me anyone. I will get back to you when I can.

 

[nootka]

Parents are NOT always right, and parents do not always know best, and parents are often so wrong they are the WHOLE problem, in which case they do need help to prevent them messing the kids up.

Jane is so right about this.

My home life was good proof of this. If I had "honored my mother" for sure, she would have...well...never mind, but it was NOT good and I defied her many times and did MY OWN THING which was far more virtuous than she could imagine or understand and she bothered me to no end about it and eventually made up stories about me that she thought were "cooler" than my life of getting straight As, not having intimate relations before I was out of high school, taking drugs, drinking excessively, etc. etc. (yes, she DID try to force me to take drugs, she gave them to me starting when I was 8 years old)

You need to find some outside help for yourself if your mother refuses. I think school is your best bet but again, I could be available for you to talk to if nothing else and I know there are many other wonderful people here that would like to be supportive. I'm so sorry for what you're going through.

I wish I had a good answer for you, but you will get past this, you will be out on your own and you will find your own happiness, but you may need to cut her out of your life (I had to do so w/my mother for the safety and health of myself and my children/husband.)

Liz M.

 

[Relic]

Jamie never let anyone even a parent suck the joy out of a passion you have. You won't be at home forever and time does pass though sometimes not as fast as you'd like. Your a good kid not on drugs smoking or boozing it up with friends you've decided to channel most of your energy into the minis and showing. Your mom should be proud and supportive of you for that l know thats one reason we got into minis to keep the girls as teens interested in things besides what the other youth were up to and one loves them beyond hope the other couldn't care less about any of them. Never let go of a passion only take a break when you feel the need life is short and regrets are long...been there done that.

 

[Reble]

We are going on a cruise for spring break!

Wish my mom took me on a cruise!!!!! :aktion033: :aktion033: :aktion033:

Hope you have a great time?, maybe that is what you guys need, change of senery?

:saludando: