A discussion on "when it's time"

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I admire your courage and sensativity to be asking the question in the first place, it's very obvious how much you care about your horses.

If it's a comfort, please know that myself and many others have been in your shoes! I made the excrutiating decision years ago, to put down my 32-year old QH mare, when she was still doing well. I decided I couldn't watch her slowly deteriorate in health, and lose the joy in life. I didn't want to see her in pain. I knew she had lived a good long life, and her last years she was a "pasture bum" just allowed to be a horse and graze, etc. It was a very, very difficult decision, but I don't regret it.

Hugs to you as you walk this road.
 
Have you tried probiotics? Just a thought.

When my guy started losing weight and having troubles digesting his hay, I added a probiotic. I started with Probios, I could use the paste and syringe it in, but thought it would be easy to use a feed through, tried the probios powder, he hated it with a passion. Then going through my Smart-Pak catalog, I came across SmartDigest, the price was reasonable, so decided to give it a try, it smells really good and he really liked it, after starting him on it, he seemed to have improved appetite. [smartDigest has both probiotics and prebiotics.] He still needed the senior feed (and I tried several before I found something he'd eat, ended up mixing a good senior I liked with a sweeter senior he liked), but was much more interested in his feed.
 
She often stares off in a direction where there is nothing there to look at. And she sometimes calls and calls to nothing. Kind of like the call they do when they're looking for their baby. It's actually pretty distressing to see..

She's looking for Cappy
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I read through all of these posts, trying to find the words or another bit of advise. When I read REO's post the tears hit, I think they hit the mark. Good luck with your decision, this is always such a difficult one. Give her a hug for me and one for you too.
 
Thank you all again for your responses.
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I think my biggest fear is doing it too soon. Have I really tried everything? Is letting her go more convenient than preparing her a heated place to spend the winter? Would it just be taking the easy way out?

I don't really expect answers, just sharing the questions that go through my mind. And I know after Puddin' I'm facing the same process with Wiz, my "Kansas" gelding. He's totally blind now and too crotchety to have his feet trimmed anymore. He's in good weight though, but is not interested in any vet care, wormer or farrier work. He's made a clear statement about what he wants - to be left alone. Unless of course I have treats, then he's interested in what I have to offer.
 
Oh Parmela, this is the hardest decision in the world... and been there, done that, so I sympathize with you having to think about this decision.

Unfortunately most of them do not just 'die in their sleep' or fall over, and a decision has to be made about their quality of life. She may begin to give you other signs or she may not... but if she has not bounced back from last winter, even with a heated barn, I fear that this winter is not going to be any better.

I had an old mare that was given to me for a retirement home- she had her own pen next to my stallion just for company. She was 25, had been a pasture broodmare on a couple of big farms, so was far from being a pocket pet. She had arthritis and could no longer eat hay, even just leaves, because she would choke. She got free fed a complete Sr. Feed because it would take her all day just to nibble and eat breakfast. Her weight stayed decent and her coat looked good, and her eyes were always bright.

The desert here doesnt get too cold in winter- it can freeze nights, but is certainly not like other climates, so I didnt have an enclosed barn. Her arthritis was a little worse- and I could tell that cold weather bothered her but the year of her 30th birthday, came home to find her down and she had to have help to get up. She was fine the next few days but then it happened again, and this time I could hardly get her up and the poor mare had been down a good part of the day. She looked at me as if to acknowledge it all, but her eye had a different look in it, and I could tell that she had been scared, laying there alone and not being able to get up.

With that happening, I knew she would end up colicking or something worse would happen..... and couldnt see her going through that. I made the decision then that it was time.... it was just getting worse and there was no turning back and it hurts me less to have to put one down than to see them scared, hurting or not enjoying life. I just cried and cried, but it was time.

I hate 'playing God' and hate having to decide when a loved part of the family has to go, but it is part of the responsibility, as we all know, of caring for all of these wonderful creatures.

I agree, that perhaps if you are questioning it, you may be answering your own question really.... Hugs to you in what you decide to do... no judgement here- like I said I think this is the hardest thing for anyone who loves animals to do. And it never gets any easier.

I would really weigh how she is going to do stuck in a heated barn all winter without being able to enjoy 'moseying' around outside, or being able to get around much, etc... And even the heat in the barn may not be enough to keep her going all winter. If she has not done that well this summer, her body is beginning to wear out now.
 
With our old girl Prin, I contacted Bonnie Fogg. Bonnie asked Prin directly. She wasn't ready to go then but we worked out a signal that Prin was to show me when she WAS ready. Prin did do it! Maybe have Bonnie talk to Puddin and ask her. It is SO worth it!

{{{{Parm}}}} No matter what, I know you'll do what's right for her one way or the other
 
Parmela, I know you will make the right decision for Pudddin, it never gets any easier to make. It puts me back to 5 years ago when I had to make that decision for Shelly, my wonderful palomino mare that was a QH/TB cross who was 36 years old. I held her while the vet put her down, it was the least I could do for her as I had owned her for over 25 years and we had done all sorts of things together, shown hunter/jumper, long distance rides and later just trail rides. She is buried at the back of my property and I planted a nice tree over her.

Give Puddin a big hug for me and one for you too for being a caring owner.

Yvonne
 
I've been a weepy mess reading through this thread because I had to make this decision just this week. I'm not in the right place right now to offer any perspective other than to agree with what's already been said, and to say that there will probably never be a time that feels right for us.

On a practical note, if pasture is the only thing she wants to eat now, what will she eat this winter?
 
Personally, I do not believe in putting an animal down as long as they are not in horrible pain. When I had a puppy that was duying because my neighbors poisoned her, I went and got a human pain pill (She was 5 months old and weighed about 25-30 pounds) and I knew she didn't hurt when she did pass. God knows when it is time for them to come home and he can and will take them when it is time. You should do as your hart tells you to do. If you are comfortable putting the horse down then that is what you should do. If doing a bit of extra work to feed her and keep her warm then do that. You know what your choices are and how you feel in your hart.
 
Parmela I don't have any advice to offer. You obviously care enough about your horses to do what's best for them....whatever that might be.

Just wanted to say that I was gratified to see that you still have Wiz. I've wondered about him often. His being "crotchety" is no big surprise as he never really wanted anything to do with anybody who didn't have a treat in their hand; and it took some tameing to get him to that point.
 
REO said what I was thinking as I read through this thread. Have Bonnie ask her. It'll ease your mind to KNOW when Puddin's ready to go. Hugs to you and Puddin.
 
Parmela I don't have any advice to offer. You obviously care enough about your horses to do what's best for them....whatever that might be.

Just wanted to say that I was gratified to see that you still have Wiz. I've wondered about him often. His being "crotchety" is no big surprise as he never really wanted anything to do with anybody who didn't have a treat in their hand; and it took some tameing to get him to that point.
Hi Donna,

Yeah, Wiz is something else! He's actually not that bad, he just has his own ideas and isn't willing to listen to much discussion otherwise.
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And you know, considering the situation he came from and that his breeding was probably by accident and not a planned event, he actually has pretty good conformation and was kind of ahead of his time in his "type." He pretty much rules the lower pasture, with the exception of Sweet Pea as nobody rules Sweet Pea but Sweet Pea. But he considers the 9 others with him (mares and geldings) to be "his" and he protects them by keeping them from the fenceline when Spirit was on the other side.
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But his eyesight has basically deteriorated to almost none now but he knows the farm and his pasture and navigates by either my voice or by the movement of the other horses. But he decided last year that he was done with having his feet trimmed, done with getting wormer shot in his mouth and done with vaccinations. He pitched enough of a fit that my farrier said "I'm done" and so did my vet. But he actually keeps his feet in really great shape naturally so I've been lucky so far. And hopefully he doesn't come down with anything from not getting his vaccinations, but I've decided not to fight him on it. The next time he needs his teeth done we're going to have to figure out a way to get some sedation in him, but until then I'm letting him be. He enjoys just hanging out and that's fine with me. He's kind of a character and I quite enjoy him actually.
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Personally I would rather make that decision a week too early than a day too late. It is never an easy one but I always remember what I was told many years ago

This is the last favour you can do for an old freind.
 
I agree with Minichick, I call the shots here (oh sorry, horrible pun there, not intended)

I have had quite a few horses put down, and only one was actually surprised, and I did feel upset by her. All the others took it in their stride, as it were.

I sent two full sisters off together, one was put down in front of the other (this I had not intended, it all happened a bit too fast) and I thought she would have been upset, at least by the noise of the shot. She never stirred, she was actually sniffing at her sister when the knacker put her down beside her. It was so peaceful I had trouble controlling myself, and I am usually OK with these things, making up my mind is the hard bit.

I would think it is probably time to send them both on their way, you will have a hard time with your conscience if you send one and not the other, how would you choose?

If I can, I always do it that way.
 
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As much as we would like to think they should all go in their sleep there are times that you need to make 'the decision." My old POA gelding passed at 32 in his stall....but he had slowed way down and i think life had gotten tedious for him he was such a character....had him for 30 years and we had been thru so much together. When my husband came in that morning we both cried cause 'Moosie" was gone.....buried under a huge pecan tree at a neghboring farm and very much loved.

On the other hand a 28 yr QG mare we had was not keeping weight on at all and I thought it was time...but was too late,, she went down and could not get up, thankfully it was a Sat, vet was able to come quickly and it was done. I never want to see one fight to get up and be too weak to do it.......

Then there is the 28 yr QH that I think won't make it thru the next winter and you go to do something to him and he gets that attitude he had as a 2 yr old.....so each situation is different......we just have to do the best we can for them and giving them up is so hard....

now I am all weepy.....wer are just all so blessed to have them in our lives while they are here...unconditional love.
 

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