whats wrong with me?

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Cara

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lightly i havent been interested in my horse, like im not ignoring her, i love her to death but lightly its jsut weird, like im geting bored with it sorta....i dont that sounds sooo stupid or mean or w.e ! urg i love riding, i took some lessons before and omg i was sooo happy like when i was on the horse everything was better and i didn thave to worry about life, i had this thought that if i get out of minis and ride i will be happier, but i dont think thats completly true, i love china more then life! but im geting bored doing the same thing year after year, like its been 7 years and its the same, whats wrong urg??????????
 

lilhorseladie

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Sounds to me like you have forgotten your own tag line. Read it again at the bottom of your siggy.

Also, renew your bond with China. Plan a date to walk or do something fun with her to remind you how much you love and need her.
 

Fantasia

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Agree - time to do something new with your horse.
 

lovinarabs

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Try something new! I totally agree! We're western pleasure here mostly, but this summer I've tried English and driving and I can't wait to get out to the barn again! New is good, new rocks!
 

bingo

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Honestly I don't get the same feeling from my minis that I did when riding and showing my big horses. To me it is not even close. Doesn't mean I do not love my minis but the 2 things are not interchangable.

If I could still ride I sure would. You are not now a bad person to decide that riding is more your cup of tea and what you would prefer to do. No more then someone deciding to sell there big horse to get a mini. You have to do what your passion is.
 

Shari

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Do something new will help....or even taking,,say a week break from them all together. Have someone else feed and do chores.

After the accident.. I was very close to giving up riding but I couldn't quite even think about giving up Maggie. Even if I never drove her again.... she is too much a part of the family.

Hope you can find a way to get the horse spark back.
 

Alex

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Cara I experience the same thing once in a while. I just dont feel like doing anything with them, cleaning, grooming, lungeing.

I take a day off and have someone else do it. Then the next day I caint wait to see them!
 

Ashley

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I have the same thing going here. However I have relized its a change in life for me, and its time to cut back to just a few pets. I have other priorities in life, and other intrestes at this time.
 

Miniv

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Take some breaks.........

For me it's like being a parent. I love my daughter beyond measure, but once in awhile you need a break.
 

Boss Mare

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Soo.. Cara, how old are you?! (don't need to answer, but question yourself..)

I started riding and showing horses when I was 4 years old.

At 12 I got my own horse..

I loved riding and had dreams of a young and hot headed Hunter/Jumper (what I was used to showing)..

My parents took in upon themselves to buy me my first horse without me knowing.. long story short he was a lame Paint X gelding in his 40's.. they were told he was 12-13 years old.. OK.. NOT!

He became the love on my life!

I soon got my TB gelding.. off the track and ready to race and jump.. but he didn't do much for me compared to my first horse, Samson..

I sold him, strictly because Sammy didn't approve.

I bought Sammy his own mini mare to keep him company.. she was there till the moment he was put to rest.. she kissed him before the needle was injected, for sure.. I saw it.. I gave him the friend he needed..

After that.. I had grown my mini population to 10.. and added another Paint mare into the mix (my riding horse) and another TB and QH..

I LOVED riding and never knew any other way until the minis.. now I am an addict..

HOWEVER..

What I am getting at is that I am in my 20's and..

trust me in all of the years these horses were 'mine' was a long hard road.. a lot of time not spent with friends and going out, etc.. a lot of days off of school or work spent caring for their needs..

I felt selfish at times, but you have to allow yourself your own time in-between everything or else you'll go crazy..

I never gave up on my equines, but I thought at once, twice or heck.. more -- selling out would be easier.. but they are my passion..

There is nothing wrong with needing personal time, as long as you fall where you want to land..
 

Cara

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im 17, but the thing is with riding, i went from never riding to jumping in 6 lessons once a week for a hour, it was amazing, my intsructor was soo prooud of me it wasnt funny, shes like amazing, and i had so much fun riding, kendra(my instructor) advanced me , and that made me so happy we bothj had fun in my lessons, but i dont have money anymore for my mini and riding, the 6 lessons i had were a gift, each lesson is $40/h so i duno, i rly rly love china but im happier when im riding, but i dont want to give up china:( i have been with china for 6 years and we have a many many ribbons and have been thrpough alot together! urg i hate life
 

Boss Mare

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OK.. I understand..

IMO and my experience.. the mini vs big horse is very different.. however.. at times when I had to do without riding or showing, etc. for whatever reason.. I ALWAYS loved the wee ones for that.. or well, in my experience the ponies I have owned/own..

To me and my passion.. a horse is a horse.. no matter what size..

Granted since mid last year I have cut my numbers in half.. my choice.. but my love is strong..

Best wishes..
 

Sonya

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Although I loved my minis to death, there was no comparison than with a riding horse. I don't have my minis anymore, and I do miss them, but NOT like I miss riding. When I get horses again, when my lifestyle changes and I have more time, it will not be minis, it will be riding horses.

From your recent posts, you have alot going on in your life right now and that is probably the main reason you are feeling this way. You don't seem that you've been happy lately and you are looking for something to change that and honestly I don't think getting rid of China and getting a riding horse is going to give you the comfort you need right now. I think you are just looking for a change in your life in general that will make you happy and a horse will probably not fullfill that. It might actually add more stress to your already stressfull life...bigger mouth to feed, etc...

Take your time and make your decisions, no one can say what is really right, only you can. You are young and will soon be on your own when you can hopefully maybe have China and a riding horse both.

Best Wishes.
 
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SammyL

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There is nothing wrong with needing personal time, as long as you fall where you want to land..
That is very true.

From your recent posts, you have alot going on in your life right now and that is probably the main reason you are feeling this way. You don't seem that you've been happy lately and you are looking for something to change that and honestly I don't think getting rid of China and getting a riding horse is going to give you the comfort you need right now. I think you are just looking for a change in your life in general that will make you happy and a horse will probably not fullfill that. It might actually add more stress to your already stressfull life...bigger mouth to feed, etc...
As is that.

I am not on the other side here...I love riding, but I love my minis more. Riding is fun, and I am pretty good at it, and could be great if I had a riding horse and a good instructor.

But for me, riding is not something I need. I need my minis.

That said, I do enjoy the weekend breaks when I am gone and my dad feeds my little herd. But I don't like being away from them, even for one day. It is hard for me when I don't have to get up in the morning and feed and go out in the evening. My breaks are usually one day long, then I want to be back in. One time, I went away for a week...I almost went nuts.

I think, for me, taking care of the minis is my personal time to be with them. It is relaxing for me.

There was a dark period in my life when I had to force myself to take care of them. They are what kept me going. Got me out of bed in the morning, etc.

I hope I never have that feeling again...it was horrible.

I think that you need to take a break for a while and decide where to go from there. Follow your heart.

Good luck, and pm if you want to talk...

 

babygoose

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Maybe try doing something different with China. I don't know what you do with her now, but maybe a different type of showing? If you drive maybe try some Arena Driving Trials rather than breed showing. Or maybe teach her some tricks. What about therapy work, taking her to retirement homes or to visit disabled/kids? It might be that riding is more your thing and you could always work towards that. Is there any way to work a deal with the trainer to work at their barn in exchange for riding lessons?

I think change in interest is normal. I have done several different things over the years. I love trail riding, dressage, and driving. Then I started getting into the minis and I LOVE these little horses. I still have my big horse and I want to get back into riding and driving her soon. But at the moment, my trainer is busy and I can't get a lot of lessons in. I don't have the confidence to just take my big horse out by myself for a drive so I drive and ride her around the farm. (she spooked with me while I was driving her and while she didn't run off and we didn't wreck, it shook my confidence a little). So the minis have been great for me to play and work with. I feel more confident with them right now. And I am very glad that I discovered the minis and found out how wonderful they are and know I will always have a mini or two around as well as the big horses.

You have a lot of time yet. As you settle into a career you will be able to afford to support the big horse and riding (although finding time to do it then become a problem!).
 

Cara

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i was going to try a differnt show circuit but that didnt work out when i didnt have a trailer, um most what i do with china now is training, go on trails groom, show, my show season is going to start geting busy that is if i get a trailer, but heres somthing new, i went to my physiotherapy sesson today and my trainer/doctor person said that geting back into riding would help stregthen my core or somthing, so thats also somthing to think about, im trying sooo hard to get a job to be able to afford both! urg its hard, i live out of town so its around a hour walk into town and my parents wont take me, and i dont have a bike so walking for me, if i cant get a job, i seem to always mess up the interviews!
 

HGFarm

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Ditto - I would pick something that you have never tried before. Stock up on LOTS of reading material on it and really study up and if you can't afford lessons, start self teaching. It CAN be done- you dont always need a trainer or teacher to help you through it all.

Pick something new and set a goal for yourself and then work on it. Everyone needs a break once in a while- the horses do to, and they REALLY enjoy learning new stuff too. They do get bored as well doing the same ol' thing.

And..... you are at 'that age'. Oh dear how I remember that and wouldnt want to go through it again, LOL

Hang in there, things change, but it sounds like you just need to bring something fresh and new into the whole thing perhaps
 

strass

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whats wrong with me?
As much as I truly do appreciate the set-up. I'm going to let you slide on this one.

Story time:

When I was your age, I used to whine all the time too. One day, I did this in front of my grandpappy and he slapped me upside the head really hard. When I asked him why he did it, he said to me, "Now you see that things aren't that bad, no matter what your problem is, it could always be worse. For instance, you're unhappy about something: Well, you could be unhappy and getting your a55 kicked at the same time. I promise you son, there are people out there with real problems."

I miss that old man so much. There's not a day goes by that I don't think of one of his sayings and how true they are.

Anyhow, what you are experiencing is part of growing up. Your tastes will change. That's why grandpappy told me and my little brother and little sister that we should avoid getting married before we were 25. None of us listened all all 3 of us already have a divorce under our belts. The person you are now is not the person you were at 15. It's not the person that you will be at 20 or 25. What matters now is that you find and build the moral character that is going to make up the person you want to become.

Honestly, I'm in my 30's and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I'm still "growing up" and changing my own tastes to match that as I go. I expect that I'm going to be "growing up" for a long time to come.
 

Marty

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Cara, you have had a lot of things going on in your home for a long time now.

There has been trouble with the parents, financial problems, loss of a family member,

and then you decided your were obese which came out of the blue.

I don't think China really has anything to do with any of your real problems.

I think you are most likely suffering with bouts of depression or mass confusion in your life.

I've been there myself at your age wondering what to do with myself at the ripe old age of 17 where a hint of a zit would send me reeling for a week. And also I've been through it with my two boys. I don't have any real advice for you other than this is part of life and part of growing up. All I can say to you is what I have said to my boys when they thought the sky was falling: "Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative" the best you can.

Hugs.
 
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