It was a bad, sad week. Anything that didn’t have to happen did, and then times that by one million. Sigh. Among other more important things, my new book was supposed to be on the market by now, but the truth is, since Tracey is not underneath my desk on my feet, I haven’t been able to write a word and finish it. For some reason, “puppy†was on my mind, now more than ever. But then I remembered that I don’t really want a puppy.
I picked up the newspaper and sure enough, there were five adds for GSDs. Could this be my lucky day? Probably not, but I called each one. I was not impressed at the lack of knowledge on the other end of the phone with the first four ads, and they didn’t have what I wanted anyhow. Number five had to be better, and it was, a little bit anyhow. I liked the sound of the lady. She acted like she had what I wanted. Paydirt! This is it, maybe, and reluctantly, but I keep thinking that I don’t really want a puppy, but I could look. I am a very good looker of puppy litters.
I called the Hus who was already in town and asked him if we could just go look, only look. And here came that well known lecture: NO!
Huh? Just flat out no? Then it was followed by, “I’ll meet you down here at 1:00 pmâ€. Here goes me like a super nut, changing my clothes, applying makeup, of course my hoop earrings, never go anywhere without my hoop earrings, and my dress up version of sneakers, the ones without horse crap imbedded in them. I was styling. Dressed for success in record time. This could be it. This could really be it. Although I knew I didn’t really want a puppy, the thought of seeing puppies was appealing enough, so I was eager to take a harmless peek.
I rushed down the mountain and got into town, only to realize that I had forgotten my puppy supply basket, and the puke blanket for the backseat of the truck, just in case the baby that I am not getting is too big to sit on my lap. I flew into Wally World, grabbing a new pink receiving blanket, another collar and leash, and a few more puppy toys, and a bag of Purina puppy chow, which is what the puppies were eating.
I meet up with the Hus and sure enough, here came the next lecture: “I told you I wasn’t shopping for anymore puppies and this is the very last time.†I agreed, shaking my head “yes†After all, I’m done picking up puppy poop from my floors and wipping up puppy vomit, and puppy pee. Surely I am way too old to ever go through puppy training again. But just peeking couldn’t hurt I thought to myself. I’m and experienced peeker of puppies.
Hus was not enthusiastic and very tired and instructed me to drive while he slept. Big mistake. Very bad, big mistake and I told him it was. Nevertheless, he pointed South, no, North, no, East, West, whatever and I was on my way to someplace unknown and unheard of. The trip was boring until I reached the town and came to a really big bridge. I don’t do bridges. I pulled over and woke up the Hus “there’s a bridgeâ€â€¦â€¦.and expected him to change places with me and take over. He didn’t’ want to. He said he was sleeping and for me to go over the bridge, so I did. The bridge was approximately 1/8 of a mile long, and it took me more than 10 minutes to go over it. Yes, I know I was holding up a lot of traffic and eventually when someone slammed on the horn, Hus woke up to find us in the middle section of the bridge and here came the next lecture: “Step on it!†I didn’t wanna. “You are ticking people off, move it!†“I’m trying, go back to sleepâ€â€¦â€¦â€¦When I finally made it to the other side I pulled over to check the directions. Something was wrong, there was no bridge on the directions. I needed the cell phone. Where’s the cell phone? Oh no, not again……No cell phone. I turned around realizing where I think I messed up and had to go back over the bridge. I did it this time in less than 10 minutes because now I had experience with that bridge and nobody honked, shook their fists, or gave me that well known finger.
I finally found the road I needed, went 18 miles up that road, turned right onto another road, went 2 miles on that road, turned left, 4 miles on that road and then down some kind of really scary gulch. Now I was on a dirt drive of some kind, very long, very steep and winding, with cliffs on both sides. I couldn’t drive that any longer. “Hus, wake up, you have to drive. I’m going to kill us.â€
Problem was that there was no place for me to get out of the truck without me falling down a steep incline, so I had to continue to drive. Yikes. Turned out, it was the dog lady’s driveway.
“Wake up, we’re here.†“How much are these puppies here?†I told him, and he turned a shade of lobster red and asked me if I was out of my mind. I nodded in the affirmative direction. He handed me a check, and said this is the last time, ever he was taking me to look at puppies, and he was going to continue his nap. Geesh……
I was greeted by a whole load of fat, bouncing, loving, little puppies. Jumping, squealing, yapping, adorable little monsters. Ten little babies after my legs. I couldn’t walk. So I sat down on the ground and was covered in puppies all over me. Ahhhhhhhh This was bliss. This had to be it. My puppy was here. I knew it. But which one? The nice lady began helping me divide the females from the males and I narrowed it down to two. But before I went any further, I asked to see the parents.
The nice lady was very proud of the parents and was anxious for me to see them. And there they were, in a pen in the yard, with a homemade dog house in the middle of it, and some sort of make shift shelter from scraps in one corner. That was probably shelter for the puppies, I assumed. The parents were not what I wanted to see at all. The sire was black, solid black. He seemed very friendly and in good condition, but I didn’t like his conformation. It just was not what I wanted. He wasn’t for me. The mother dog was very small, very petite, extremely fine boned, and her conformation was way off from what I had in mind. If they were a quality dog, I didn’t see it. I also didn’t like her markings at all, her coloration for me, was not what I would call pretty or striking.
I turned back around because I had to. There they were, all ten little babies right there on my heels as if to say “pick me, pick me.†I went back to examine the mother and father again with a fine tooth comb, trying to find something, anything in either one of them that would make me want one of their puppies badly enough. But sorry to say, without falling head over heels and being terribly unimpressed with the parents, I had to pass this litter by. This was really hard, but I knew that if I didn’t like the parents, the puppy would not be the dog I wanted, opps, I mean the dog that I don’t want, right?
I went back out to the truck where Hus was snoring up a storm. I knew he was tired, but not this tired! Anyhow, I got in the truck and I was very sad, but not that disappointed for some reason. This time, and he woke up. “No puppy, again, right?†“Right.†And now he says “Come on, get a puppy, there’s a puppy in there for you, come on get a puppy.†And I shook my head, no. I cranked up the truck, here came yet the all time lecture: “This is the very last time I am going to take you to look at puppies, so if you don’t get one here, don’t ask me to take you any more places because this is it!†Yea, I know, I know, I know. Besides, I don’t want a puppy anyhow.
On the way home, it finally hit me like a ton of bricks. That the real reason that I can’t find the perfect puppy for me is because there really isn’t one. My Tracey, the one I had simply cannot be replaced. I can’t replace old memories with new ones if my heart isn’t in it. There will never be a dog with the right color, the right conformation, the right anything for me. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that out.
As I pulled the truck up in the driveway, I could hear barking coming from inside the house. He knew we were home. We walked though the backdoor and was greeted by old Devin, the dog from he77, the dog had surgery that still looks like Frankendoggy. By the way, he’s doing fine and will be getting his stitches out this week. There he was wiggling from side to side, squealing in excitement that we were finally home. Awwww, I left the poor old completely housebroke, belligerent, arrogant, flesh eating monster doggy zilla all alone. Jumping, barking, so happy to see his mama and daddy. Sometimes all you really need is what is right in front of you, and you just don’t see it. [/size] [/font]
I picked up the newspaper and sure enough, there were five adds for GSDs. Could this be my lucky day? Probably not, but I called each one. I was not impressed at the lack of knowledge on the other end of the phone with the first four ads, and they didn’t have what I wanted anyhow. Number five had to be better, and it was, a little bit anyhow. I liked the sound of the lady. She acted like she had what I wanted. Paydirt! This is it, maybe, and reluctantly, but I keep thinking that I don’t really want a puppy, but I could look. I am a very good looker of puppy litters.
I called the Hus who was already in town and asked him if we could just go look, only look. And here came that well known lecture: NO!
Huh? Just flat out no? Then it was followed by, “I’ll meet you down here at 1:00 pmâ€. Here goes me like a super nut, changing my clothes, applying makeup, of course my hoop earrings, never go anywhere without my hoop earrings, and my dress up version of sneakers, the ones without horse crap imbedded in them. I was styling. Dressed for success in record time. This could be it. This could really be it. Although I knew I didn’t really want a puppy, the thought of seeing puppies was appealing enough, so I was eager to take a harmless peek.
I rushed down the mountain and got into town, only to realize that I had forgotten my puppy supply basket, and the puke blanket for the backseat of the truck, just in case the baby that I am not getting is too big to sit on my lap. I flew into Wally World, grabbing a new pink receiving blanket, another collar and leash, and a few more puppy toys, and a bag of Purina puppy chow, which is what the puppies were eating.
I meet up with the Hus and sure enough, here came the next lecture: “I told you I wasn’t shopping for anymore puppies and this is the very last time.†I agreed, shaking my head “yes†After all, I’m done picking up puppy poop from my floors and wipping up puppy vomit, and puppy pee. Surely I am way too old to ever go through puppy training again. But just peeking couldn’t hurt I thought to myself. I’m and experienced peeker of puppies.
Hus was not enthusiastic and very tired and instructed me to drive while he slept. Big mistake. Very bad, big mistake and I told him it was. Nevertheless, he pointed South, no, North, no, East, West, whatever and I was on my way to someplace unknown and unheard of. The trip was boring until I reached the town and came to a really big bridge. I don’t do bridges. I pulled over and woke up the Hus “there’s a bridgeâ€â€¦â€¦.and expected him to change places with me and take over. He didn’t’ want to. He said he was sleeping and for me to go over the bridge, so I did. The bridge was approximately 1/8 of a mile long, and it took me more than 10 minutes to go over it. Yes, I know I was holding up a lot of traffic and eventually when someone slammed on the horn, Hus woke up to find us in the middle section of the bridge and here came the next lecture: “Step on it!†I didn’t wanna. “You are ticking people off, move it!†“I’m trying, go back to sleepâ€â€¦â€¦â€¦When I finally made it to the other side I pulled over to check the directions. Something was wrong, there was no bridge on the directions. I needed the cell phone. Where’s the cell phone? Oh no, not again……No cell phone. I turned around realizing where I think I messed up and had to go back over the bridge. I did it this time in less than 10 minutes because now I had experience with that bridge and nobody honked, shook their fists, or gave me that well known finger.
I finally found the road I needed, went 18 miles up that road, turned right onto another road, went 2 miles on that road, turned left, 4 miles on that road and then down some kind of really scary gulch. Now I was on a dirt drive of some kind, very long, very steep and winding, with cliffs on both sides. I couldn’t drive that any longer. “Hus, wake up, you have to drive. I’m going to kill us.â€
Problem was that there was no place for me to get out of the truck without me falling down a steep incline, so I had to continue to drive. Yikes. Turned out, it was the dog lady’s driveway.
“Wake up, we’re here.†“How much are these puppies here?†I told him, and he turned a shade of lobster red and asked me if I was out of my mind. I nodded in the affirmative direction. He handed me a check, and said this is the last time, ever he was taking me to look at puppies, and he was going to continue his nap. Geesh……
I was greeted by a whole load of fat, bouncing, loving, little puppies. Jumping, squealing, yapping, adorable little monsters. Ten little babies after my legs. I couldn’t walk. So I sat down on the ground and was covered in puppies all over me. Ahhhhhhhh This was bliss. This had to be it. My puppy was here. I knew it. But which one? The nice lady began helping me divide the females from the males and I narrowed it down to two. But before I went any further, I asked to see the parents.
The nice lady was very proud of the parents and was anxious for me to see them. And there they were, in a pen in the yard, with a homemade dog house in the middle of it, and some sort of make shift shelter from scraps in one corner. That was probably shelter for the puppies, I assumed. The parents were not what I wanted to see at all. The sire was black, solid black. He seemed very friendly and in good condition, but I didn’t like his conformation. It just was not what I wanted. He wasn’t for me. The mother dog was very small, very petite, extremely fine boned, and her conformation was way off from what I had in mind. If they were a quality dog, I didn’t see it. I also didn’t like her markings at all, her coloration for me, was not what I would call pretty or striking.
I turned back around because I had to. There they were, all ten little babies right there on my heels as if to say “pick me, pick me.†I went back to examine the mother and father again with a fine tooth comb, trying to find something, anything in either one of them that would make me want one of their puppies badly enough. But sorry to say, without falling head over heels and being terribly unimpressed with the parents, I had to pass this litter by. This was really hard, but I knew that if I didn’t like the parents, the puppy would not be the dog I wanted, opps, I mean the dog that I don’t want, right?
I went back out to the truck where Hus was snoring up a storm. I knew he was tired, but not this tired! Anyhow, I got in the truck and I was very sad, but not that disappointed for some reason. This time, and he woke up. “No puppy, again, right?†“Right.†And now he says “Come on, get a puppy, there’s a puppy in there for you, come on get a puppy.†And I shook my head, no. I cranked up the truck, here came yet the all time lecture: “This is the very last time I am going to take you to look at puppies, so if you don’t get one here, don’t ask me to take you any more places because this is it!†Yea, I know, I know, I know. Besides, I don’t want a puppy anyhow.
On the way home, it finally hit me like a ton of bricks. That the real reason that I can’t find the perfect puppy for me is because there really isn’t one. My Tracey, the one I had simply cannot be replaced. I can’t replace old memories with new ones if my heart isn’t in it. There will never be a dog with the right color, the right conformation, the right anything for me. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that out.
As I pulled the truck up in the driveway, I could hear barking coming from inside the house. He knew we were home. We walked though the backdoor and was greeted by old Devin, the dog from he77, the dog had surgery that still looks like Frankendoggy. By the way, he’s doing fine and will be getting his stitches out this week. There he was wiggling from side to side, squealing in excitement that we were finally home. Awwww, I left the poor old completely housebroke, belligerent, arrogant, flesh eating monster doggy zilla all alone. Jumping, barking, so happy to see his mama and daddy. Sometimes all you really need is what is right in front of you, and you just don’t see it. [/size] [/font]
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:bgrin :bgrin I think that's the closest I've been to being kicked out of the house though!!! LMAO But Dad is one of Moxie's big supporters now!!!!
