Oh boy...
Rory,
The system is NOT perfect. I've seen some very scary files, and had them "appear" 3 months after the student started at my school. In order not to be sued, we hop to it RIGHT away...one of the greatest problems I've seen is that the administration treats parents like idiots...doing the special education thing is kind of like playing 20 questions...you have to know what questions to ask in order to get people in gear, and doing their jobs. Let me tell you that even if you don't have the money for a lawyer...just say the word, and you will get help for your student. School districts are scared to death of getting sued. That not only will cost them time and money, it will mean that they will have to show why they are out of compliance to the feds. The special ed teachers themselves are liable. I get malpractice insurance through my union...pretty scary when a teacher has to do that, eh?
Kim...I know the feeling...here's my story.
I have known that Kyle was having problems since 1st grade. He one time told his first grade teacher that he was an alien, and that he took humans back to his planet for food. They got the district psychologist in on that one...they thought he was another Jeffery Daumer!! They had meetings without notifying me...I'd have sued them, but I didn't know until we moved away from the district. The notes were in Kyle's file. It was noted that they should "keep an eye on him" because he was exhibiting some "diviant behavior.
In 5th grade I insisted that Kyle be tested, and they found the non-verbal learning disorder. Because of his IQ, and the fact that he didn't need help with academics, they put him on a 504 plan.
The next year Kyle was found with a knife in his pocket. When asked by the principal, Kyle said that he had made a remark that wouldn't it be something if so-and-so got stabbed. Instantly booted out of school! But because of the 504, we had to have what is called a Manifest meeting...that answers the question...was the behavior caused by the disability. Now remember, those notes from 1st grade were still in Kyle's record...but everyone chose to ignore them and I didn't know of their existence! The principal was an a**hole. He made sure that everyone said that Kyle should go on to the expulsion hearing, and get kicked out of school. I argued with them. I pointed out that if a student that was on honor roll suddenly starts failing classes, that's an indication that there are more problems, and warrents testing. I said of course the behavior exhibited shows that Kyle needs a more restrictive environment, not to be set loose on the streets! The principal looked at me like I was an alien, but then I pointed out my teaching credentials!!! The vote was still against me, and so I went home and called a lawyer. She was in the office, and she specialized in special ed cases. She told me the right questions to ask, and said I was on the right track, and if I needed to use her name in to go ahead...but if I needed her to represent us it would cost $10,000!
So, I went to the district office and prepared to do battle. The district special education director had a meeting with me before the expulsion hearing because she had been notified about my concerns. She told me that Kyle had to fail for 6 months before they felt testing was warrented. I told her that her 6 month limit did not fit with the law...and that Kyle needed testing NOW!! I stated my case, and fortunately, (when I mentioned something about the lawyer I had consulted!) she disbanded the expulsion hearing, and agreed with me. I was able to choose the psychologist who would test Kyle. It is that psychologist that found the notes from 1st grade. After he found the severe social anxiety, the agreed to let Kyle back into school. He had been in an interum placement so that he didn't lose any time with school. The bussed him clear across the town to another middle school. My husband and I told them that there was too much animosity and they he was not to go back to the old school. Kyle was placed on an IEP for the emotional disorder and I was able to pull my claws back in. Oh, by the way. I found out later that the staff at the middle school where the ruckus happened when through "retraining" concerning how manifest meetings should be conducted. HMMM, I ruffled a LOT of feathers!
Being an advocate for our children is certainly not easy. It takes time and energy. I knew that we were right...and I proved it. I was proud of myself, I was calm, and insistent. I pointed out the facts, and stated my case. I was squeeky. If as a parent you have difficulty understanding what the administrators of the school is saying, there are advocates out there for parents. You may take anyone you want to with you into a meeting. The law requires that you be given the papers that tell you what your rights as a parent are. Carefully read them, and if you don't understand them, get someone to help you. Don't let the system beat you. When I am in a meeting with parent, I let them know that we all have a common goal..and that is to help the child. I can hold a meeting and empathize with the parents because I've been in their shoes. It helps!
Kim R.
