Generally, being a novice when it comes to horses, I enjoy encouraging folks in their endeavors with their horses.
HOWEVER.....this is a topic of which I LIVED AND LEARNED,
only by the Grace & Guidance of God!. I daresay this topic is something which I have equal amounts of intellectual research and PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE.
David was diagnosed at 3 years of age.....HE WAS BORN IN SWITZERLAND WHEN I WAS 36.
Aspergers falls within the realm of what "professionals" call the broad spectrum OF PDD (PERVASIVE DEVELOPMENT DISORDERS). There may be a lot of misdiagnoses at the moment among mental health "professionals"....DON'T GET ME STARTED.
For those of you who think this diagnosis is a bunch of BULL, I'd ask you to think of it as diabetes! Each patient has a certain degree of the disease. ONLY DIFFERENCE....diabetes can be measured.....while PDD/ASPERGERS/AUTISM is subjective.
When I worked at the hospital, two neurosurgeons each had autistic boys....both with varying degrees. One doctor's son had the same early childhood teacher as David. The doctor specifically sought me out, as he heard of David's mother's rather unorthodox methods of bringing him out of his world.
What Kim & Kay have/are going through is TRULY SAD! Where were "the experts" who could've diagnosed these children at a young age? I'll tell you.....school administrators don't want to stretch their budgets to test kids and EDUCATE THEMSELVES regarding autistic children, whatever degree they have it. These children must be worked with at an early age. Parents must consistently raise "the bar" on their social behavior.
LIKE IT OR NOT, WalMart cashiers and other folks were subjected to David's extended hand to thank them for their service....and make eye-contact. He was four years old at the time, and still makes a practice of this social grace. I stayed home with our son, to the detriment of our financial situation, so untrained people would'nt be left to care for him. Can you imagine how he would've turned out if he were exposed to such folks....just so we could afford a new car, riding mower, etc.?
TALK TO RABBITSFIZZ AND BONNIE FOGG......they'll tell you Aspergers students are treated the worse of all autistic children in schools. Why? They have a high IQ, but socially challenged, which makes untrained teachers come to the conclusion that they're troublemakers.
When David entered the third grade (multi-age class), after three days, the teacher wanted him out of the class. Said he "couldn't make it in multi-age".....when, in reality, she didn't want to take the time to understand a child that would've been one of her most polite students. Now, two years later, he's in a multi-age class with another teacher who works with the first teacher who kicked him out. The original teacher thinks the world of David, but has trouble making eye-contact with me. Now, how did that happen?
Untrained teachers and members outside the immediate family often tell parents, JUST MAKE HIM SIT DOWN, etc! My family consistently told me that I was nuts and I the cause of his "problem". They all lived out of state and never met the child!
Oh, let's not forget a psychologist who said I was David's problem, It was his opinion that David would develop better if he played sports! :new_shocked: Another mental health professional told me not to teach David "humor" because he'll never fully understand the ramifications of "trying" to be humorous...and anger people.
A man once told me......... GOD GIVES SPECIAL KIDS TO SPECIAL PEOPLE!
As Kay said, and Kim perhaps knows in her "gut"....until you've lived in their shoes (as mothers, we "culturally" take the brunt of the blame for not raising the kids "right") NOBODY has the right to minimize their situation. Like Kay says, it affects the entire family and their ability to live a "normal" life....like taking family vacations, going to the grocery store, seeing a movie, visiting relatives/friends, etc. Frankly, it's a continuous stab at a mother's soul, as they "hurt" for their child.
Forgive me, but to those folks on this thread who are pooh-poohing this diagnosis, I challenge them to care for Kay or Kim's children for one week.....minimum! Trust me, their perspective will change dramatically and subsequently offer their condolences and develop a special respect for Kay and Kim.
To be fair, this diagnosis might be confused with many children who are deemed to have ADD. Very often, I believe this is "over-diagnosed" for parents who choose not to take their parental responsibility seriously. Rather, these parents take the easy way out and seek an inexperienced "professional" to obtain the preferred diagnosis to excuse their children's behavior, along with their lack of interest/inability to "parent" their children.
I'm in the process of writing a book, filled with humorous stories, of challenging "authority" with unorthodox measures I pursued in raising David to be a productive member of society. We have a choice in how we perceive any challenge....with humor or dread. Bonnie Fogg encouraged me to direct the book to school officials and parents of newly diagnosed children. It'll be a series of short-stories to encourage those involved to find humor/positives in caring for these children.
Yep, this is a long post. It's written to encourage KAY & KIM.
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