keeperofthehorses
Well-Known Member
Manure, Lots and Lots of it!
Free to manure lovers across the globe!
We have multiple types of animal manure for those who are in need of that specialized desire.
The following types are available:
*Rabbit pellets: This manure is for the beginner, light weight and comes in many different sizes. We have worked hard to train these critters to manufacture just the right size pellet for that “sling-shot†snot nosed kid who aggravates every one of your neighbors.
*Dog manure: This specialized dung is for the “joker†of the family. This refined, highly superior manure is specially prepared for that right moment to impress your next door neighbor as he is greeted with this “flaming†soufflé. This fine batch comes in a variety of colors and textures. Sorry this product can not be freeze dried prior to shipment due to the eco standards and the risk of endangerment to the local fly species. Free paper bags are included with every 50 pounds ordered.
*Horse apples: These tender morsels of finely processed vegetation are a must for the nosy neighbor! Just place fresh apples around the entry way where these perps snoop and they won’t be looking long! Every batch ordered comes laced with a fresh mixture of fly bait. Want to know whose snooping? Just look for the guy swatting at the thousands of flies buzzing around his feet.
*Lamb duds: These “milk dud†replicas come either individual or in clumping arrangements. Now this product is not for the novice but the serious practical joker! Got them grabby fingered grandkids? Put a plate of these wonderful treats out on the counter and watch them disappear! Guaranteed to make them brats ask before they eat another goodie behind your back. These custom made clumps are perfect for those who have moved to the city and have no “dirt-clods†for their children to throw at each other! These tender beans can be compressed together by even an two year old, and just let them darlins throw to their hearts content. Guaranteed not to leave bruises.
*****THIS WEEK SPECIAL!*****
For the country folk moved to the city, we offer a multi-pak special!
No more having to smell that smoggy air with this premium product guaranteed to bring back childhood memories of tip-toein through the pasture! Each 100 pound box has been specially formulated with a special mixture of farm by-products that will fit any hillbillys taste. Invite your neighbors over and gladly share your families culture as they are treated to this country stravaganza!
Sorry but due to the bird-flu impending pandemic we are unable to ship chicken chitlins, sorry to those want-a-be stay at home explosive experts.
Now don’t wait! These fine products aren’t gonna last forever! Order your free manure today!
A special fee of $100.00 is required due to a gov’t B.S tax
Send your order today to:
Uncle Cappy’s Crappies
123 don’t wanna go there Lane
Pooperstown , USA
Wups, thought this was on the Back Porch.
I don't know how to fix ('puter dummy).
Free to manure lovers across the globe!
We have multiple types of animal manure for those who are in need of that specialized desire.
The following types are available:
*Rabbit pellets: This manure is for the beginner, light weight and comes in many different sizes. We have worked hard to train these critters to manufacture just the right size pellet for that “sling-shot†snot nosed kid who aggravates every one of your neighbors.
*Dog manure: This specialized dung is for the “joker†of the family. This refined, highly superior manure is specially prepared for that right moment to impress your next door neighbor as he is greeted with this “flaming†soufflé. This fine batch comes in a variety of colors and textures. Sorry this product can not be freeze dried prior to shipment due to the eco standards and the risk of endangerment to the local fly species. Free paper bags are included with every 50 pounds ordered.
*Horse apples: These tender morsels of finely processed vegetation are a must for the nosy neighbor! Just place fresh apples around the entry way where these perps snoop and they won’t be looking long! Every batch ordered comes laced with a fresh mixture of fly bait. Want to know whose snooping? Just look for the guy swatting at the thousands of flies buzzing around his feet.
*Lamb duds: These “milk dud†replicas come either individual or in clumping arrangements. Now this product is not for the novice but the serious practical joker! Got them grabby fingered grandkids? Put a plate of these wonderful treats out on the counter and watch them disappear! Guaranteed to make them brats ask before they eat another goodie behind your back. These custom made clumps are perfect for those who have moved to the city and have no “dirt-clods†for their children to throw at each other! These tender beans can be compressed together by even an two year old, and just let them darlins throw to their hearts content. Guaranteed not to leave bruises.
*****THIS WEEK SPECIAL!*****
For the country folk moved to the city, we offer a multi-pak special!
No more having to smell that smoggy air with this premium product guaranteed to bring back childhood memories of tip-toein through the pasture! Each 100 pound box has been specially formulated with a special mixture of farm by-products that will fit any hillbillys taste. Invite your neighbors over and gladly share your families culture as they are treated to this country stravaganza!
Sorry but due to the bird-flu impending pandemic we are unable to ship chicken chitlins, sorry to those want-a-be stay at home explosive experts.
Now don’t wait! These fine products aren’t gonna last forever! Order your free manure today!
A special fee of $100.00 is required due to a gov’t B.S tax
Send your order today to:
Uncle Cappy’s Crappies
123 don’t wanna go there Lane
Pooperstown , USA
Wups, thought this was on the Back Porch.
I don't know how to fix ('puter dummy).
