After the hospital sends your husband home on Wed and tells you to come back on Friday morning for blood work. Then you wake up Friday morning and he is dead in your bed. Your life is thrown into a do what you can to survive mode. You make a lot of decisions that you later know were not the best. But you have to go on the best you can. I had my daughter's family move in and they helped a lot at first then the past year I was doing most of the farm work and working 48 hours a week at my factory job. ( you can only go so long seeing a grown man sit around smoking and drinking while you work your but off). So I had them move out, so I am pretty worn out most of the time. I am starting on Social Security retirement and going part time at work. So now maybe I will have the time to enjoy my 14 mini's . I had to put my big horse, Wyatt down this past Sept, he was 28 years old , had a good life, so I could deal with that. Then in Nov I had to put down my beagle, she was old also, I new that was coming also. Now I will have time to check in and see how everyone is doing. Hope everyone from the past is doing well. I sure do miss going to AMHR shows but since my husband was the one that drove the horse trailer, and helped with the grooming. I probably will not be going to any in the future. I have a few good friends that help me show at the county fair, and I am very grateful for them.