I don't know why, after the week I have had, that I ended up on this thread. For the first time I got mad about how my horse was treated and put myself out there this last week. I try to stay home, or hidden online much of the time because I wonder sometimes if I too am dysfunctional. Especially the way some people respond to my post sometimes.
My sister and I grew up part of a large Italian family, but unfortunately our mother is evil incarnate, married to my father who suffered terribly in WWII so he was dysfunctional but intelligent and a hero. All of your horrible descriptions describe just part of what we endured. Both of us finally just cut off from her in order to remain sane. But she is such a good liar and actress that the rest of our family thinks we are terrible daughters. Growing up neglected, abused verbally and physically, and constantly moving tends to make you struggle for years just to learn what normal is, and how to function in the world. Many times we had no idea what the other kids in school were talking about for things like tv shows, movies, toys. I never once had a lunch at school, not once. And there is so much worse, but I learned to hide it well. I truly feel bad for all of you that have been treated terribly by others.
Because of the unfairness of an overabundance of love and care that was shown to our brother it took me awhile to realize why I go ballistic when I see a child, or when I was younger a handicapped child, or an animal treated unfairly or mistreated. That led to my kids keeping quiet about anything remotely going wrong at school, poor things lol. (injected humor)
I don't have a thick skin and I too get comments, even from doctors that are insulting about appearance. Many times people are just plain ignorant and don't realize they are insulting you, or hurting you. It still hurts, but I recognize an honest mistake. My hairy/furry kids are my life here for all the reasons mentioned. I too try to shop for groceries early, early, other things online or just not go to shop, I don't even go to my husbands company dinners. As much as sometimes I would like to, I never join any functions or clubs for art or horses because there are too many wonderful things in life to enjoy besides natty, jealous gossip, competition, clicks/cliques and mean spirited people. I admire those of you who can set aside someone's nasty temperament and just go on.
I have never, ever even breathed a hint of my childhood, not even my husband knows the extent of what was done to us, but I guess that is why I ended up here, and it helped. I never thought anyone would believe me, or would just think I was weird to talk that way about my mother. Thanks
I was recently told that I looked better in a photo I have with longer hair ... well most people look better in professional photos taken 10 years ago 
