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* Michael * Two years ago today

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Marty

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Michael is gone now two years ago today. Time doesn't seem to help things get better. We are still every bit hurt as much today as two years ago. We still have meltdowns. We still cry every day. We miss our Michael and want him to come home.

I have made a lot of very good close friendships here, and Dan also has made some very good friends here too. We want you to know how much your support and friendships has meant to us. We could not have gotten this far without you. Much love to you.



To date I wrote 187 poems about and for Michael

This is one of them that I don't even remember writing early on

Mom I hope you aren't mad at me

because I got the mini chopper to run

I just had to try it out a little bit

I was having so much fun

I remember we were working on the fence

and you told me to go take a break

Instead I went back to the garage to work

but I didn't know it would be a fatal mistake

After a while I finally got it going

I was so proud of myself

No one's been able to fix it for years

I did with old parts from the garage shelf

You know I wasn't even on the road

I just wanted to see how it would handle for me

I know what happened after that

Mom, someone ran over me

He drove off fast and left me mom

I was there all alone in the grass

Then I realized you heard it all back at the house

The sound of the terrible crash

Mom I really wanted to stay

I did my best to try

I hung on as long as possible

and I could hear you cry

Mom I'm so sorry I had no choice

I tried to come back two times they said

but my heart wouldn't jump start any more

and before I knew it I was dead

There was a light that was pulling me up

as I left my body behind

I floated up with Angels

and they were so very kind

I kept looking down below

and it was awful what I had seen

dad was covered all over in my blood

but somehow I still felt serene

I asked the Angels to let me come back

I told them you'd want me back home

but they said that God was waiting for me

and that I wasn't really leaving you alone

I asked them so many questions

and wanted to know about Dad

I was worried that I was in trouble with him

when I leave tools out he gets mad

I wanted to know about my little brother

and who's going to watch out for my Dan

but the Angels assured me that it all will be right

and he would grow into a fine young man

I can see you mom in a very bad way

I expected that from you

You keep crying all the time

but there's nothing more I can do

You have to remember our last days together

and my new comic routine

I made you laugh so much those days

but now I only hear you scream

I know nothings' going to be enough for you mom

but right now it's the best I can do

I know you want to touch my face

and have plenty of hugs left for me too

Use those hugs to wrap around Dan

and tell him they are from me

and I hope you plant that little garden

and take care of my willow tree

Then plant some flowers around it

and I'll help sprinkle them with some of my tears

they'll grow this time I promise you mom

and help you get through the years

Mom I know it's been a long time

and you can't seem to let me go

That's alright, I understand

I will always love you so

I chose these because they have special meaning to Michael and me


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nrq3DFa7AxE...feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bax8FqBECd0
 
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Feather1414

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I still miss him.

I was actually talking to Tabitha the other night, and oddly enough that same night I was watching Captain Ron. I think he was there laughing with me.
 

Barbie

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Marty-

Thinking of you, Dan and Jerry today as you mark this sad day.

Take care,

Barbie
 

Charlene

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bless your heart, marty. i cannot possibly know your grief and i cannot possibly say anything that will bring you comfort. there simply are no words. you are in my thoughts and prayers.

i have been told the pain never goes away, it just gets "different", maybe some day even tolerable. i hope that day can come for you and your family.
 

Maxi'sMinis

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I am truly sorry I didn't know Michael, what a handsome boy. Through your writings I feel I do know him. Thank you for being so strong and sharing your thoughts with all of us. Prayers that God continues to give you strength to go on day to day. You are an inspiration.

God bless Marty your are in my thoughts.
 

REO

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:CryBaby


I know that he was the child of your spirit. There will never be words enough to tell you of the pain in my heart. I send you all hugs now and always.
 

Leeana

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I will be thinking of you, jerry and dan all day today. I truly sorry Marty, truly
. Still remember where i was at when Fran told me
 

kaykay

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Marty there just are no words but you know how much I love you and hurt for you.

Kay
 

sfmini

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I was at the AHMA June BOD meeting when I saw that posting. The rest of that trip is just in a fog. I just couldn't believe that happened, and just felt so very sad for your family.

Thinking of you today.
 

SampleMM

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Marty,

My heart goes out to you and your family on this day. Through reading your posts, it is obvious that you are a very special person. My best friend's son died at 19 in a car accident. She struggles with it everyday too.

I can't help but think that in the end those that have suffered so much will be so happy forever.


Take care,

Debbie
 

minie812

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I have never "LOST" a child but I do believe in spirit and I know he is with you in your heart and I believe that you will be together again as a family and again your family will be complete
 

Crabby-Chicken

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Two years.... it doesn't seem possible. It change a lot of our lives on that day. I know it changed mine. It showed me not to assume everything will always be the same. It taught me, through you, that if the most feared thing happened in my life, I will go on. You showed me you can,,, will, and I hope I can do it with class as you did.

I hope from now you can be in a little less pain. The trial was always looming in the future. I hope Michael can show you that he is fine and watching out for all of you. I wish we on the forum could take some of the pain away.
 

RobinRTrueJoy

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I remember. He wasn't mine, but I think of him a lot. Wish I was there to give you a great big hug.

love,

Robin
 

Sanny

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I've been thinking about Michael and your family for the last couple of days and have visited his web pages.

I will NEVER forget when it happened and all the smallest details that were shared with us.

My birthday was yesterday and though I'd remember Michael anyway, I think of him whenever I think of my birthday. I try to remember all the fun, good stuff that you've shared over the years about raising the boys instead of just that terrible, terrible day.

I hope your family is doing ok and are spending the day together. You will be in my thoughts today especially. I cannot even imagine me being as strong as you have been through all of this.
 

SWA

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Marty, no words can ever be said enough. Just holding in continued love, hugs and endless prayers for you and your precious family.
 

lilhorseladie

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Marty,

When I think of how your heartbreak rocked this entire forum, changed how we all thought, acted and looked at our own children. We all lost a little the day you did, but I can not even fathom, your feelings of loss. I for one, didn't know you or Michael, but I will never forget that day two years ago. First there was a happy, funny post about the barn or fence or something you were all working on, then...then... the very heart wrenching post about Michaels being run down. Marty, I am praying for you all today, friends and family. I think each of us, need to remember Michaels love for life, family and animals today and take an extra moment to appreciate what we have, because in a blink, a millisecond, it could be gone. So as I head out to finish chores, and as I deal with friends and family, and strangers on the street, today will be Michaels day...I will work to find an extra bit of kindness to bless others.

Hang in their Marty
 

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