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TN Belle

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Okay, I need some serious advice, help, and opinions on a sensitive topic. I am entertaining the thought of getting a tubal ligation (sterilization). I am 30 and still have never dreamed of having kids and babies terrify me, so a pregnancy is not in my plans. Since the brain tumor can be an issue with the radiation I had and am continuing chemo, it kinda solidifies my idea of no children (from me ). I love the idea of adopting and I could give a home to an older child that usually gets picked over. I have tried to persuade hubby to get a vasectimy but is having no part of it. I can kinda see his issues too and what if something happened to him, am I gonna require any man in my life to get it done. We haven't been intimate in a very long time since all this tumor stuff happened last Oct and we are both going nuts. My doctors have told me to stay off the pill and hormones if possible due to complications with one or the other. Fine with me, I don't like the idea of anything artificial in me anymore either. I had been on bc pills for almost nine years before, so I am kinda new to what my alternatives are. Besides having the tubal done, I think an IUD would work, but the nonhormone kind is pretty rough according to my OB. It has copper on it and will cause more cramps and heavier flow and she told me she removes more than she puts in. Neither sounds too appealing and since hubby won't give any input, I guess it's up to me. There seems to be several different types of tubal ligation and I am not concerned about reversal, so please let me know of any experiences you may have had with and with what kind of procedure.
 
I can be of little help as I have not done this, but can sympathize with hubby not wanting to do it. Mine is convinced it will affect his "virility" for lack of a better term. He still thinks he wants another kid, though not me. Three boys is plenty and I'm 40, there's just no need.

My best friend had her tubal right in the hospital after she had her second daughter and said it was very easy, she was a little sore for a few days but no big deal. I am not sure of the "type" she had, just that she was concerned that it was permanent so that she would not worry about getting pregnant. So far, so good, that was almost four years ago!

I wish you luck...

Liz
 
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My friend had the Merena IUD put in. ( Its about $600 ) She loved it!! Her monthlys were barely there if at all and she was protected for 5 yrs, then when they wanted to have a baby dr removed and she was free to get pregnant immediately, no waiting like with the pill.. She has a 8 week old baby girl now...

But if you dont want to have children, the tubal sounds good too.. Depending on your insurance, the cost might be more than an IUD but you would be protected forever...

Good Luck..

Missy
 
I have the Mirena IUD --- and have loved it -- having it removed soon as I am now menopausal so don't need it anymore. Had several IUDs over the years and never had any problem with any of them (even the copper ones).

If your insurance would pay for tubal -- I would do that.

JJay
 
I had a tubal done right on the table after my 2nd daughter was delivered via c-section. I "think" they burned the tubes?? Something like that. My daughter is 15 now and no more pregnancies for me. Of course, don't have to worry about that now!! I can't tell you what just the tubal was like as the pain & recovery were all intermingled with the c-section.
 
Hi,

I am an OR surgical tech, for the last year we have been doing a new sterilization which is a tubal, but instead of having to go through the abdomen and having the laparoscopic gas, they can occlude the tubes from the uterus by going through the cervix with a small scope, they leave the coils in the tubes, it is permanent and not reversible though. It is easier on the patients, and a pretty quick procedure . Your GYN should be able to tell you about it, (called Essure, you can google it online)

Amy
 
I had a tubal done when my daughter was born via c-section, at first I had some more cramping than my prior menstrual cycle but after a couple of months I was back to like I was before. For me its been good and I was back doing my normal routine in just a short while.

Karen
 
I had a tubal done right on the table after my 2nd daughter was delivered via c-section. I "think" they burned the tubes?? Something like that. My daughter is 15 now and no more pregnancies for me. Of course, don't have to worry about that now!! I can't tell you what just the tubal was like as the pain & recovery were all intermingled with the c-section.
I had a tubal done on the table after my son. As I had a girl and a boy and didn't want to have anymore I got it done. My son will be 6 and my hubby and I decided that we would do foster care for little ones as I love babies. If it's what you want do it. My friend had IUD's and they aren't comfortable for Sex (that's what her hubby said). She ended up having a hystorectomy as she had other problems.

Christy
 
I have the Mirena IUD....I love it! No periods whatsoever...greatest thing since sliced bread...no worries, nothing...it is wonderful! It last's for 5 years. Mirena does have hormones in it, but very very minimal.

Warning though...IUD's are normally only given to women who have had children...basically they have to dialate your cervix....and if you haven't had children it can be very difficult... (I have not had any children, I am 38) took my obgyn about a half hour to get it in and I wanted to drop kick her in the face. The procedure is basically like giving birth as far as the cervix is concerned...the cervix has more pain receptors than any other part of your body. Women who have not had children can also reject the iud and basically...spit it back out (funny visual there!)...I haven't had any problems though, it was just tough getting it in and my dr almost gave up..I have about a year and a half left on mine and you bet I will go get another one...I do not want my tubes tied...no reason to put myself under anesthetic when not needed. I've thought about sending hubby under the knife...but you know what babies men are!

I can almost bet your insurance will pay for it...mine gladly did with no questions asked...after all, it's much cheaper than having to pay for a childbirth or even BC pills monthly for 5 years...the IUD is ultimately healthier than taking pills for long periods of time and is the most effective method of birth control aside from a chasity belt.

If you want to PM me, I can give you details...it was not that bad...I've had worse...after all that you've been through...IUD will be piece of cake
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wanted to add...with a tubal (which is permanent...you never know if you change your mind, you are very young) you will still get a period...why not have the benefit of no period with the IUD! If you were to change your mind, they take the IUD out and you can get pregnant ASAP..(but of course should wait for regular cycles just like the pill).

And I can see no way that anyone but you and your Dr would know it's there..unless a male is Johnny Holmes, he'll never know it's there...gauranteed!
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Just out of curiosity....why won't your husband have a vasectomy? My husbands friend and brother both had one done and it was "nothing". It is much less involved than what women have to go through. Plus from what I have heard there are less complications with the vasectomy. Just curious
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Just out of curiosity....why won't your husband have a vasectomy?[/quot
well, when you think of the alternatives...an IUD is not surgery and can be reversed at any time...a vasectomy/tubal ligation is not that easy to reverse..
 
IUD = inter uterine device It is something that is placed into the uterus and makes it so an embryo will not attach. Although from the sounds of it, there wouldn't be an embryo in the first place if you are no longer cycling.
 
The non hormone copper IUD works by killing sperm, the articles I have been reading say it's the best "morning after" emergency treatment cause it works immediately. But that it increases your flow and cramps - for the first few months supposedly. I read somewhere too and can't find it now that an IUD or the tubal, not sure wich one, increased your chances of cervical and ovarian cancer and I don't need that.
 
I am 30 and still have never dreamed of having kids and babies terrify me, so a pregnancy is not in my plans.

Just some food for thought:

At 30, I was the same way.

I didn't have any younger siblings to practice on, never changed a diaper in my life or cared to, babysat only once in my life and never again, didn't need kids, babies were never in the picture, and I definitely possessed NO maternal instincts.

Then one day at 36 I woke up pregnant just 3 months after I got married.

After the initial shock I got used to the idea rather quickly and actually amazed myself that I was so excited. Certainly wasn't part of the plan but I took to being pregnant like a duck to water. So I had this gorgeous baby come out of me with the biggest blue eyes and that was it. Suddenly I was in such love it couldn't be described. He was so beautiful, strong and healthy, truly an angel sent from heaven. He would grow up to be good and kind and change the world and do good things and stick up for ones that needed help and be their protector; thus he was named Michael after Michael the Archangel. All I wanted to do was love him to pieces and play with him night and day. But there was one problem:

Had no clue how to hold it........it was squirmy

Had no clue how to feed it.....it didn't use a bucket.

Had no clue how to clean it.......manure fork wasn't going to work

Had no clue how to wash it.....didn't know how to tie it on the wash rack

Had no clue how to dress it......couldn't find the syrcingles

But it was well worth figuring out and turned out to be so much fun, and made my life perfect in every way so I repeated that recipe yet again and called it Daniel. Had no intention of stopping with two, but the daddy said it was enough. I'm still mad about that especially now because you never know what can happen and now Dan is alone.

Doing things very final that cannot be changed back sometimes is not always a good thing.Perhaps something removable in case you change your mind later on in life?
 
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Just out of curiosity....why won't your husband have a vasectomy? My husbands friend and brother both had one done and it was "nothing". It is much less involved than what women have to go through. Plus from what I have heard there are less complications with the vasectomy. Just curious
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It is not uncommon for a man to not want a vasectomy. First off Men are babies! 2nd they dont want it to hurt their masculinity ( it wont- they will perform the same ) some men just wont believe it! 3rd Some Men tell horror stories to their friends so they WONT want to do it! LOL

Yes it is so much less trouble for a man than what a woman goes thru, but that is true with so many things we ladies do as opposed to what men do.Cramps, Monthlys, PMS, Morning sickness, Having Babies-labor and delivery.. Just the truth...

You know if a Man was to have a baby, there would only be 1. He would tell all his friends about how much it hurt ( labor/delivery) tell them he hated puking with morning sickness, so No other men would ever do such a painful unfun thing!

We women are the nesters and so we have the babies... God knew what he was doing... LOL
 
I've had my tubes done for the past...4 years I think it is now (I'm 28) and couldn't be happier. I've know that kids are not my thing since I was a kid. I have my sisters kid(s) to play with and quite happly give her back.

Should I one day wake up another person and want a kid, there's always adoption. Besides, I have so many animal kids that I'm not willing to take the time away from them to look after a person kid.

...Wow, that came out pretty blunt
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I can be of little help as I have not done this, but can sympathize with hubby not wanting to do it. Mine is convinced it will affect his "virility" for lack of a better term. He still thinks he wants another kid, though not me. Three boys is plenty and I'm 40, there's just no need.

My best friend had her tubal right in the hospital after she had her second daughter and said it was very easy, she was a little sore for a few days but no big deal. I am not sure of the "type" she had, just that she was concerned that it was permanent so that she would not worry about getting pregnant. So far, so good, that was almost four years ago!

I wish you luck...

Liz
:shrug::: Steve and I agreed we were done with babies and 2 minutes in a Doctors office vs. actual surgery was quite a no brainer. The threat of not ever having sex again, well that helped too~LOL

Just out of curiosity....why won't your husband have a vasectomy? My husbands friend and brother both had one done and it was "nothing". It is much less involved than what women have to go through. Plus from what I have heard there are less complications with the vasectomy. Just curious
default_unsure.png

It is not uncommon for a man to not want a vasectomy. First off Men are babies! 2nd they dont want it to hurt their masculinity ( it wont- they will perform the same ) some men just wont believe it! 3rd Some Men tell horror stories to their friends so they WONT want to do it! LOL
Then there was Steve who was out riding around on the 4 wheeler the next day. His big V went great!
 
I have not been "fixed" yet, but I too have thought about it. I have 3 kids and am DONE!!!

I just saw in a Drs ad, something like a tubal, with only a small hole and a scope I think done in the Drs office . The way it was described, was like it was minimaly invasive and very quick easy recovery ect. Maybe look into that.

Good luck!!
 
Some tubals can be reversed. altho costly. My DIL had it done. She had her tubes tied when she was married to her first husband, about 6 years prior to meeting my son, and her divorce.. My son wanted to have kids..so she checked into having a reversal, most of the Wi. hospitals said to her, it would be almost hopeless to conceive after this procedure is reversed, plus the price for the operation was almost double here in Wisc. She found a doctor who came highly recommened in So. Carolina ( I think) went down there had it reversed, was in and out of the hospital in the same day.. and within 2 months she was pregnant. The cost of it was around $5,000.00 in So. Carolina. They now have two kids of there own, and she has had her tubes tied again. Never no problems.
 

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