Horse Show Etiquette

Not to make excuses for myself; I have a low serotonin level and an anxious personality. If it's too warm for me I tend to go off the deep end too easily. Or the perfectionist in me kicks in and I don't control it. So I embarrass myself and my husband or Mom (she's still showing at 84). Last year I was the horrid show ring etiquette person at a show. My husband and I were showing in Liberty and the plan was I was on the entrance/exit end and he was to cover the middle/far end. Well, he basically covered the middle and part of my end, so the horse stopped to sniff around several times at the far end. I was yelling at him to get down to the other end and when we got out of the ring I proceeded to "ream" him out about it all the way back to the stalls. I am SO ASHAMED of myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Performancemini, the trick I think is not to be perfect and never do anything you regret in life or in the ring, but rather to acknowledge your mistakes and try hard to improve. We have all done things, whether while showing or just in every day life that we wish we could take back. Obviously you are not so terrible because your husband forgave you and you are able to face up to when you are in the wrong. Its the people who think they are entitled to behave in any obnoxious way they please that need to wake up.

poniesrule said:

Ok, so the stud comment... I would be guilty of saying something like that to my daughter. Mostly because she's 7 & usually has her head in the clouds and isn't paying attention to what she's doing & is lagging behind me. Like at our first mini show this month, she was dinking around and I was trying to walk to the bathroom with my toddler who was doing the pee dance, my 7 year old was watching what was going on in the arena and wasn't paying attention to the stallion that was throwing a fit ahead of her. I had to say loudly, but not quite shouting, "watch out, that horse is a little stud and he needs room. Pay attention!" I didn't mean it as a negative comment toward the horse or the handler, I wanted my daughter to pay attention. And I always try to make sure my girls understand that there are certain horses that are going to act a little different based on their gender... stallions can be "study" & mares who are in heat can be "mareish" heck, our gelding is a grumpus half the time. In your case I think it was absolutely uncalled for because your little man was chillaxing at the time. But as a mom with kids who are just getting around horses, I tend to be a little over protective while being understanding. And show-mom... I really really try hard not to be like that, but failed miserably at our show because I was so nervous. Guess who brought home a bunch of 1st place ribbons & who didn't! My kids beat me soundly all the way around, thank you nerves. It was my first time at an actual show rather than a pay day/gymkhana. We learned a lot, and I read this whole thread several times before going

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See what you said I would have been fine with, that was telling your daughter to pay attention and to give the horse room. My boy wasnt acting stupid and I had my full attention on him since I knew he was a little stressed and was keeping him away from the bulk group.

The comment was made toward him just because he was the only "stallion" there. Her daughter was more in the teenage age and was well away from my boy with her large pony/small horse just chilling at the ring side. I looked at her with a "that was uncalled for" type of look but of course she would not look me in the eye after that.

Performancemini said:

Not to make excuses for myself; I have a low serotonin level and an anxious personality. If it's too warm for me I tend to go off the deep end too easily. Or the perfectionist in me kicks in and I don't control it. So I embarrass myself and my husband or Mom (she's still showing at 84). Last year I was the horrid show ring etiquette person at a show. My husband and I were showing in Liberty and the plan was I was on the entrance/exit end and he was to cover the middle/far end. Well, he basically covered the middle and part of my end, so the horse stopped to sniff around several times at the far end. I was yelling at him to get down to the other end and when we got out of the ring I proceeded to "ream" him out about it all the way back to the stalls. I am SO ASHAMED of myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Reignmaker Miniatures said:

Performancemini, the trick I think is not to be perfect and never do anything you regret in life or in the ring, but rather to acknowledge your mistakes and try hard to improve. We have all done things, whether while showing or just in every day life that we wish we could take back. Obviously you are not so terrible because your husband forgave you and you are able to face up to when you are in the wrong. Its the people who think they are entitled to behave in any obnoxious way they please that need to wake up.

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I agree with Reignmaker, its the people who think they do no wrong and what they do is because they can with no consequences.

Here is a good example for you all since it happened over the weekend to me at a horse show... this involved a gator type vehicles (so this would apply to all the people who drive their golf carts etc at horse shows that they need to pay attention, which I know some do, but some do not)

When I was headed back from the show arenas to the horse trailers since my classes were done, I came out of the cross walk for the horses and headed down the road to the opening where my trailer was located. When I started to walk down the side of the road with my boy, I noticed a gator type vehicle come at us at a good get. Since my attention was draw to them and their speed I wasnt paying 100% attention on my boy.

As the gator flew by us and to the camper area my boy spooked, bolting forward and cow kicking out at the same time and nailed me in the side of my knee cap, (when this happens my kneeds always buckle) so as I took a step forward to step up with him my knee buckled and I slammed to the asphalt. With my weight from the fall and him whirling around as halter caught him and his weight on it my halter snapped at a week point and he took off like a bat out of heck.

Ive never seen him move so fast in my life, by the time I peeled myself off of the asphalt and limped down to the show arenas where he took off to, he already had gotten nailed twice in the neck by a paint standing by the arena and had about 5 wanna be cowboys jumping after him like they didnt have good sense... amazing how non-horse sensed people become when there is a loose horse. Finally a by stander just quietly walked up to him and slipped a lead rope around his neck and caught him for me.

This all could have been avoided if those guys on the gator slowed down as they passed us. I think I was the worse for wear after all that but it could have been alot worse.

Mini something like that happened to me 16 years ago, we had just purchased our first horse and was rough bordering him. I had him on his lead taking him to his paddock. I let him nibble at grass on the way down and a truck with a trailer with junk on it flew by us and my horse bolted. I tried to hold on and he jerked me off my feet. The man in the truck was a sports injury surgeon and a horse person. He apologized but it took many years for this novice horse owner to get over the fear of leading my very spooky stb. He's 23 yo old now and still a nervous nelly. Those gater people should have known better, your boy could have gotten hurt.

Once when showing in liberty class, or really after this is what happened to me. My mare had a really good time of it, not enough animation to win, first but whe did well and I have her come to me for the catch. Pretty happy with our performance I guess I wasn't paying close enough attention as we were exiting the ring. Just as I walked out of the gate the next exhibitor started cracking and waving a whip with a plastic bag attached trying to fire up her horse. She succeded in fireing up mine as she spooked right into me knocking my legs out from under me. Down on my back I went. It only hurt for a little while!

lucky seven said:

Mini something like that happened to me 16 years ago, we had just purchased our first horse and was rough bordering him. I had him on his lead taking him to his paddock. I let him nibble at grass on the way down and a truck with a trailer with junk on it flew by us and my horse bolted. I tried to hold on and he jerked me off my feet. The man in the truck was a sports injury surgeon and a horse person. He apologized but it took many years for this novice horse owner to get over the fear of leading my very spooky stb. He's 23 yo old now and still a nervous nelly. Those gater people should have known better, your boy could have gotten hurt.

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Thats good at least he stopped and apologized, most people usually do not. Im glad my boy didnt get hurt and he is a tough little guy.

Riverrose28 said:

Once when showing in liberty class, or really after this is what happened to me. My mare had a really good time of it, not enough animation to win, first but whe did well and I have her come to me for the catch. Pretty happy with our performance I guess I wasn't paying close enough attention as we were exiting the ring. Just as I walked out of the gate the next exhibitor started cracking and waving a whip with a plastic bag attached trying to fire up her horse. She succeded in fireing up mine as she spooked right into me knocking my legs out from under me. Down on my back I went. It only hurt for a little while!

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Ouch, thats almost like I did just the opposite, onto my side. I think it hurt more landing on the asphalt really then it did when he kicked out and hit my knee.

Is it just me or was there a lot of "whooping" going on during the Amateur Stallion classes at R Nationals this weekend? I didn't know we were at a western or saddlebred show here o.0'

To me is rude and inconsiderate to the other exhibitors and the judges trying to concentrate on judging the horses especially when the classes were ranging from 20-30 horses just in halter.

I hope someone addressed this issue because it was so annoying and bad when I was watching online that I had to turn my sound off. And it wasn't just one person sounded like a whole freaking group of them.

Rude showmen/women - HOW NOT TO RUN YOUR ORGANIZATION

This is a LONG one, better grab your drink and sit down for a bit!!

Have some serious stories (MANY more than one) but 3 incidents in one day stand out in my mind and memories.

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We'd been back in NC for 15 months, the first time with horses/ponies. I'd struggled to find instructors/trainers that would work with our small ponies & young children (insurance issues prevented some lessons - Madira was just 5 and Sierra was 4) and had gone on to do the work with them all myself. I AND they worked hard and we finally were at a point where I thought they might be ready to go "show off" what they'd accomplished up to this point when we were invited by a young lady (through our Equine Vet) to come to their clubs' OPEN show. The show included classes for children in ours' age groups, but not for ponies (I mistakenly thought that this was OK - not thinking about how many "biggies" are out there that have never seen small equine of any sort).

Never been to a show at 1 pm in a very hot state in July. I was hot and flustered and VERY LOST when I finally managed to find the showgrounds (several 3 point turn arounds with a stock trailer on very narrow NC back roads)... a bit later than I'd planned. UGH. I unload the girls and ponies and before I go to do their entries, get them dressed and outfitted ponies touched up etc and leave them at the in-gate waiting for their numbers and me to come back (the foal to the one mare is IN THE CAB OF MY truck in the air conditioning, LOL). The mare was quiet at the gate and the girls were off to the side where I'd left them. Got them entered in the classes and had their numbers and returned to find an ADULT man telling all three of them that their PONIES were NOT ALLOWED on the showgrounds and whomever had dropped them and their little misfit POS's off needed to remove them (and lots of other NASTY, MEAN THINGS) - of course - all 3 girls were in tears, already sunburned faces going splotchy/red with the tears and icky noses running freely and then the ponies started getting upset too... I was "up in arms" but think I maintained politeness ever so much better trying to show the girls right from wrong - told the "gentleman" to mind his own business, pulled out the baby wipes from my pocket and cleaned up the girls', quieted the ponies, attached numbers and we went back over what was expected of the girls to perform (pattern showmanship class - YIKES)... The youngest, Sierra, refused to enter the ring. OK, I'll let you bow out. The other two - at first - were pretty "froze up" when the MALE Judge asked them questions about horse care and class patterns. Not difficult and both knew the answers, but... The other kids in the class were having problems at this point too (some of the larger horses were dragging their handlers around - afraid of the ponies), so he restarted and then our oldest, Skye (8yrs) found her tongue and answered - quietly and correctly. The judge BEAMED at her - which caused her to relax and Madira (5 1/2 yrs) followed suit. She stumbled over her next answer and it wasn't correct but did quiet her now dancing mare (dam of foal, now with me at the gate) and reposed her - almost correctly. I was proud of their abilities at this point - no not perfect but OK and w/ lots to build on. They didn't forget much once they "un-froze". I pretty much had the class pinned correctly in my head BUT forgot about the son of the "gentleman" at the gate. He didn't place at all (my oldest took 1st and the middle took 5th/last) and Dad was MAD! Didn't even let the girls' out of the gate before going into another very nasty rant. FINALLY, some members of this club took hold of him, pulled him aside so we could clear the gates and get away...

A little bit later, I made an embarrassing mistake that could have resulted in injury. The girls/ponies are now under saddle and they are practicing in the arena before the classes start for riding. A storm is building and the breeze is freshening. 'Dira is riding the mare and I'm holding the colt while they stop so that he can nurse. He's a very short 15 days old. The Judge approaches us and states that while in her riding class, the colt can be turned loose to run "at her side". Oops - I should have known better. When they enter the class, it's got quite a number of kids on all sizes of horses. The ponies ours are riding are the smallest and then that TINY baby was in with them, too. It was fine until he started zooming around! Can you say that those horses got upset? I managed to duck under the rails and catch him as he zoomed by again, the gate keeper let us out. BUT the whole class had been affected (I wanted to drop in a hole)... FINALLY, everything returned to normal and the class was finished. I was just thankful everyone was OK, can't remember how the placings in that one went... I kept a hold of the colt for a couple more classes - overall, again, I was proud of our girls and their ponies. Last class they were in - then we dashed for the trk/trlr as the storm opened up. Almost literally "threw" the ponies w/ their saddles on, into the trailer and the girls and I hopped into the truck to wait it out. The lightning was pretty spectacular...

The storm went by and we hopped out and unloaded the ponies to untack and wipe them down (they'd gotten wet thru the open sides of the stock trailer when storm blowing sideways). The Judges' "job" was soon done and he came and introduced himself to us and spoke to me for a while. NOW - I had been out of the horses but I had kept up with the industry. I knew who this QH judge was, knew where his QH farm was and was thrilled that he was giving back to "our" community by judging a small, open show. I was both flattered and thankful for his kind introduction, his handling of the showmanship class that was our daughters' intro to the "HORSE SHOW WORLD" and the fact that he had some nice pointers. Then he went on to state - ".... when your daughters are finally off the little craps & into the full size horses, they will "clean up"..." He handed me his card and stated ..." when they are ready for REAL (& yes, it was emphasized) horses, visit us..." and I was stunned. ........................ REALLY?

The ponies were tied at the trailer, now unsaddled, while the girls and I got some burgers/dogs/fries and watched them setting up for the gaming classes. As they rolled out the barrels - Skye realized what was going on. "MOM - are they going to do barrel racing like in the Rodeos we watched w/ Papa/Gramma?" The first class was announced and I'm studying the program. "Well, yes" and all 3 turned to me with big, shining eyes and chirped "CAN WE?" "Well, we haven't practiced..."

"MOM, we KNOW the patterns -do them all the time (on their stick horses in races w/ the other kids in our neighborhood in town)..." I left them by themselves watching the 1st adult barrel racing class, while I went up to the Entry booth and checked to see if they could still enter their age group classes. I ended up only entering the oldest and the youngest, since Madira didn't look so good (she would go on in the next few years to get sick at almost every show we attended and THAT's how she remembers her summers - being sick at "all" the shows I "drug her to").

We go back and retack up the ponies. 'Dira is not upset about not riding. We didn't have any western gear for Skye, she was riding english, so she still was. Didn't occur to me to use 'Dira's saddle on Skye's larger mare and just let the stirrups down. Also, Skye's pony has a huge trot, but not a real good canter/gallop... Hmm... Into the ring they go and it gets quiet as Skye and Magic TROT to the first barrel, make their turn and TROT to the 2nd barrel (she remembered the pattern YES!!) - as she's lining up to the 3rd - EVERYONE starts screaming - get that pony moving, get to that barrel. Seemed like encouragement and finally Magic did break into a weird, choppy canter (she wasn't happy with the thick clods left by the rain/tractor before the games either). Then rounding the 3rd barrel, the "booing" started... Skye & Magic were "Boo-ed" right out of the arena - at a trot! Then it was Sierra's turn on LITTLE Stuffy (maybe 35/36" at the time as a 26 month old shetland). She's wearing a western hat and saddle and though she starts out at a trot, Stuffy gamely plows thru the ground and picks up a canter... Breaks to a trot when Sierra almost took her the wrong way, corrected and went on. They managed a GALLOP from 3rd barrel home BUT they were also "Boo-ed"... It was almost the same for the pole bending class. Funny - they both placed in both classes!!

All of the classes were a jackpot system - they won $$ back instead of getting ribbons/trophies. The 3 girls did well enough in each of their classes that they PAID for all of the entries AND the gas and the FOOD we ate!! I kept the card I wrote their winnings on for YEARS... Tossed it when I put all the info on computer only to have that computer hard drive crash a few years ago. BUT I haven't forgotten!

It was quiet on the way home. I was thinking the girls were understandably tired, but then they all started simpering... "What's wrong with Stuffy?", "Did we really do something wrong?" "Why were they "Boo-ing (OMG, I had thought I was the only one to hear that!)?" "Why didn't anybody LIKE our ponies - aren't they really good?"...

All I could think was "O, Lord, grant me strength..." and "Larry, where are you when we need you to help explain the cruelty that abounds w/i our human race (he was in Saudi)?"... We made it home, my answers must have sufficed somehow, the girls were bathed and tucked into bed after dropping the ponies at the pasture they lived in.

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I never attended another event put on by that Organization. Maybe it was wrong, but living/handling ponies and kids "by myself" while hubby was overseas was enough. Instead, we went to other events, some not nearly as exciting as the gaming, but more accepting of the small ponies. 2 years later, this same Organization knew that I had gotten together with another trainer/instructor and we had a slew of kids riding OUR ponies and some horses. They wanted us to come support their events - ESPECIALLY the YOUTH EVENTS. l refused and the person calling me about a specific youth show said I was "mean" for not supporting their children's events and a few OTHER NOT VERY NICE THINGS. I don't remember being rude or nasty, but I could have been. I didn't go - but the trainer/instructor DID - taking 4 children, their families and 2 of our ponies (along with horses owned by the other families). It didn't go any better than the first show from what I understand and the trainer/instructor was VERY UNHAPPY (she hadn't believed me when I'd told her about my first experience with this group - said I was blowing it all out of proportion) but then she believed me!

I wasn't as "Snap Happy" then with a camera, the camera was a 35mm (meaning lots of hard copy prints to get 1 or 2 nice ones!) but I managed to get a couple of shots of the girls that day!

"Spirit" in the cab of the truck (O, yea, when I moved the truck/trailer and then "unloaded" him from the cab, you should have seen people's faces!! He jumped out on his own - on the lead rope - when I asked) and then Madira (sunburned!) riding Patty w/ Spirit hiding behind. This was after "their" class and Spirit was a bit "spirit-less"... LOL



I added a pic of Sierra and Stuffy while getting a lesson in showmanship the next weekend. But every show (3 or 4) for the next year or so, Sierra would either have to have me go in the ring w/ her (starting out holding her hand) or not go in at all if I wasn't allowed to go in too...



And Skye riding "Magic" -



We had just picked up Magic over Valentine's Day weekend and she's been under saddle since mid-April - so 90 days. And in future shows, Skye would be wearing her jacket (except at a few shows where it was allowed to let them ride w/o), proper Jod knee straps and a saddle pad that fit the smaller pony and saddle properly, with the pony's mane also braided correctly (well in a long, running French braid)...

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Not sure how we ever continued with showing over the years, but that's many other stories!!

Wow Paula !! That is a great story. Not what happened to your children but the way "you" handled it.

That "Trip home " would of broken my heart listening to the kids ask those questions.

Can only hope that children getting into showing or any sport for that matter, don't have to encounter ( ill try and be polite) "Morons" Like your kids had too.

Ryan - there were days that I HATED my "beloved" horse industry and definitely hated the state of NC where I sometimes felt stranded by my hubby!! That wasn't the only incident of "moronic-ness" (think I made a word up!) displayed over the years, here. It has been a struggle for me to understand some things/beliefs of people here in the south...

But after visiting my favored western states, after being gone so long, I found some of the same attitudes and I realized it was probably just "life". Doesn't always make it easier, though!

and thank you.

Paula, you are a better person than I am, if someone treated me or my students like that at a show...lets just say I would get myself thrown out. As far as etiquette, a lot of it comes down to common sense and good old respect, two things that many people know nothing about. My worst show experience was at a fair show when I was in high school. I grew up riding huntseat equitation then got into jumping and once I began riding at an Arabian farm, I took up saddleseat. All of which I competed in extensively, but western was something I barely dabbled in. Well a friend had a lovely western pleasure mare and she let me share her. I borrowed her show clothes and tack and rode her mare in a few shows and she borrowed my hunt outfit and rode my gelding English. We rode each other's horses in a few classes at several shows that year. We decided to enter a few classes at the fair that year and normally the hunter divisions were so big that they split the classes. That year the western pleasure class had over 30 entries! That was huge, considering the previous year they had 4. Anyway, during my first class, thete was this woman was leaning over the rail holding the prize list and she was discretely fluttering the pages to spook other rider's horses as they jogged by. She of course refrained from spooking the horses belonging to her students. Well, luckilly the mare that I was riding was unphased by her blatant stupidity and poor sportsmanship. I sometimes cannot help myself...so I cued her to hug the rail real close, and as we passed this idiot at a lope, I stuck my right foot out over the rail and I kicked her square in the jaw with that oh so pretty and heavy shiny engraved silver stirrup! Knocked the stupid twit right on her butt. I Got "excused" from the ring of course, but it was worth it. To add insult to injury, no one helped her up, but the spectators "woo hoo'ed" the minute I kicked her and "awwwed" as the ring master escorted me out. Not my proudest moment.

Recently at an open show this summer, I had a beginner rider in a walk-trot class who was doing well, until another exhibitor rode her horse's nose right up her butt for the whole class. Neither of them placed. I politely asked the girl to keep a safe distance behind the other horses to no avail, so for the third and final class of her division, we tied some red curling ribbon in our pony's tail that was left in the trailer from the fourth of July parade. My mare doesn't kick (if she did, that girl would have learned a valuable lesson) instead she just "tailgated" my pony for the duration of the first two classes. I thought the ribbon would make a statement, perhaps her trainer would smarten up and tell her to back off. Well it did, sort of, she rode up some other horse's butt for the last class and got kicked out at twice , our student placed second while the creeper got the gate. Come to find out, that girl had never ridden before, this was her first time on a horse! Her "trainer" just threw her up there and told her to follow someone else. Some people!

I should Laugh....................... BUT

serves her self right for her poor sportsmanship

That was supposed to be I Shouldn't laugh , but you get my drift

I remember when I was about 10 years old and I was attempting to warm up for stadium and up to that point was a cold miserable fall day. Got soaked totally through my dressage test (could not wear rain jackets in the ring) and then they called cross country because it was so sloppy the first horse and rider got injured and the rider when to the hospital, ugh.

Due to the sloppiness, the stadium warm up jumps were just chewed up at their take offs and for my petite 15:1 QH mare she just sunk into these holes and the warm up wasn't large enough for them to reposition the jumps. After about the 4th time of my mare just shutting down and refusing to jump the oxcer because of the deep mud this snot ball of a teenage boy prances up on his million dollar push button horse and says I have no business even competing there.. Luckily even though my trainer was a quiet person he saw this transaction happen and ran up to the boy and grabbed his horse by the reins and literally embarrassed him in front of everyone that was present. He already had his eye on him because he cut me off more than once to the smaller warm up jumps causing my little mare to either refuse or for me to have to turn out at the last minute bc there he was.

Unfortunately that has rattled me because I was already a timid and shy person when I was younger and ended up getting eliminated from the course, so that and the mud didn't help my little girl's attempt (who was barely four to begin with); two babies trying to cope.)

Amysue: you are my idol now! Lol

I have to add one from my driving endurance ride this past Sunday. So a friend of mine convinced me to take one of my minis out for an endurance drive/ride that was a "fun" competition, no stress, not formal etc. So I took my stallion out with her gelding prior to this event to get use to being outside of the ring. He did as well as could be expected for how green he is to outside the ring driving. Right before we finished the drive (my friend and I headed out together) she noticed his breastplate was a little lower then normal, but we were so close to home and it wasn't bothering him nor was it dangerously low so we decided to just wait and fix it when we stopped.

As soon as I crossed the finishline behind my friend, one of the two women at the finish line starts freaking out trying to stop me saying the breastplate is so low he is going to fall o.0' there is no way when I had the top strap behind the hook. I told her to calm down and I would stop to the side before heading to the trailers and fix it. Well I guess this woman couldn't wait, as I had stopped my stallion and was slowly getting out (since he is a freaky type of horse and we are in the "doing everything slow" stage) and I didn't even have my self half out of the cart she runs up and grabs at the breastplate.... weellllll my stallion had NO idea she was there and she didn't announce herself to him, so what does he do? like any normal horse freaks out and bolts. So here I am half out of the cart (easy entry), reins in my left hand trying to stop him so the cart doesn't knock me to the ground and I have the woman screaming to let him go o.0' yeah right no thanks I don't feel like chasing a run away mini and cart. So I get jerked and twisted and nailed also in the back by the EE cart.

Luckily, I can hold him and pushed her out of the way to get to his face so he could see me.. As im trying to calm my poor shaking mini and attempting to get the reins to the front so I can get him to follow me, the other woman is yelling at me to get out of the away because a bigger horse cart is coming across the line, no mind you there is PLENTY of room and they were barely coming in at a trot.. at this point I am so infuriated by both women I told her to screw it...

Come Monday, I spent two hours in my chiropractors office because my left side was so torqued head to toe from the disaster that one woman caused because she couldn't keep her hands off my horse. The pain was so bad I was throwing up, couldn't eat or drink and so on. I have a condition were my nervous system makes pain 10xs worse then the average person at this point in time of my life (due to a car accident)

IDK if its because our horses or small or what but I can guarantee you she would have not done that to a large horse or a team. Its now three days later and I am still peeved due to what she put my horse and myself through.

That is a bad scene. What a stupid woman. Busybody? Micromanager? You are right...she would never have rushed up on a big horse. Hope you get bettter quickly.

Totally could have been avoided and really all she had to do was ask if I needed help